LIFE IS SIMPLE
We are pleased to offer Jerry Crownover ’ s “ Life is Simple ” column . Jerry is a graduate of the University of Missouri . He and his wife , Judy , own and operate a ranch west of Springfield and are FCS Financial members . We hope you enjoy Jerry ’ s Ozark humor and wisdom .
“ Life is Simple ” Copyright 2015 , Jerry Crownover
Years ago , when I was a professor at the university , one of my favorite courses to teach was Soil and Water Conservation . The upper division class was usually populated with idealistic juniors and seniors who had hopes of being employed by the USDA ’ s Soil Conservation Service . That was their dream job because , in addition to being a government job with great benefits , it would allow them a career that afforded them the opportunity , to a great extent , to be outdoors , as they helped farmers and landowners implement soil and water conservation techniques .
Every year , on the first day of class , I ’ d have a little fun at their expense when I would ask , “ How many of you hope to land a job with the SCS after graduation ?” After watching almost every hand go up , I ’ d follow up by stating , “ OK , then you need to know two essential facts to realize your goal .” As I watched these eager young students grab their notebooks and pencils to start writing down my profound statement , I would recite , “ Water runs downhill … and payday is Friday .” At that point , a few students would laugh , a few would roll their eyes , and a few would get mad . I would then point out that through my several years of teaching that class , I had discovered that many students couldn ’ t detect the difference between up and down when they were standing in the middle of a 160 acre field . Thirtysome years later , I ’ m beginning to wonder if I know the difference .
About a month ago , I had gone to a special cow sale at one of the local auction facilities and had been walking through the pens of cattle ; looking them over . It was almost sale time and I decided I ’ d better get to the seating area while there were still seats to be had . It had been a long day and I was tired , so I decided to take the elevator instead of climbing the stairs ( the state-of-the-art auction barn only has two levels ). As a friend and I boarded the compartment and the doors began to close , a fellow rancher stuck his hand out to block the door from closing . “ You boys going up ?” he asked .
I answered , “ Yep ,” immediately , before realizing that , from the ground floor , up is the only option . I thought of those students from years ago .
As if that ‘ senior moment ’ wasn ’ t enough I had the cowboys out a week later to help me with the springtime cattle-working . We had put in a long day and were ready to gather the last bunch of cows and calves , which required repositioning several portable corral panels . Since the panels are twenty years old , many are bent and warped and require two people to hook them together . Danny was on the end with the latches , while my job was to either raise or lower my end to enable them to fit together . Once Danny had latched the bottom fitting on one of the panels and was attempting to connect the top , he yelled to me , “ Lift .”
Like an idiot , I asked , “ Up ?”
“ Oh , I don ’ t know ,” Danny replied in his typical cowboy drawl . “ Have you ever tried to lift down ?”
Overhearing my faux pas , the other three cowboys had to take a knee to laugh it off and all I could think about was how I had chided those college students , so many years ago , for not knowing the difference between up and down .
HEARTBEAT | SUMMER 2016 15