How Do You Mend a Broken Heart ?
Handling criticism is hard . Who wakes up in the morning and says , “ I cannot wait to be criticized !” “ Please tell me what you think is wrong with me !” “ I love to be corrected !!!” “ Please point out my shortcomings !”? Not many . Whoever said ,” Sticks and Stones may hurt my bones , but words may never hurt me ” lied . Words sometimes hurt the most . Most of us hate to be criticized . Many times we are just heartbroken at the very mention of anything other than applause and commendations . Our feelings are hurt even when the criticism is “ friendly .” Unfriendly criticism can be especially hurtful . People say things that hurt your feelings all the time . Some intentionally . Some unintentionally . I have learned to reflect on John C . Maxwell ’ s advice : ½ of it is true---fix it . The other ½ is their issue — ignore it . You can ’ t get bogged down in the hurt , but move on to the help .
We can all stand to improve . Life is about continuous improvement . We can always learn a way to perform better and stronger . The analogy of a gold medal athlete is especially illustrative . Gold medal athletes still practice . Every day ! They are at the top of their game and they still practice . They still train . They still look for ways to make themselves better . One great reason that they do this is the other athletes want the gold . I don ’ t think I have ever heard an athlete say , I am training very hard so I can get a silver medal !!!! No coach encourages a team to try their hardest so they can win second place . At the start of each race , the runner tries for first . When they see they can ’ t get first , they still push for second . They may end with a bronze medal , but that is not where they begin their aspirations . Life is the same way . You have to begin with a winning attitude . Someone pointing how a way to do it better can only help you . As difficult as it is , move beyond taking it personally and use it to your advantage .
There are many critics who are not trying to make you better . They are trying to bring you down . Even your worst critic can give you great advice . You just have to look for it . Use what they meant to be negative to be a positive improvement for you . You also have to recognize what is meant for harm because of jealously , insecurity , or just plan meanness . Mean words or actions can only hurt when you allow them to get to you . If you take a mean comment to heart and allow it to stop your progress , you fuel the fire for more . When they see that their comments accomplished the intended result , they will continue to send the hurt your way . When you become impervious to their meanness , they will eventually stop because their purpose is frustrated . The best reaction to a meanhearted person is to succeed in spite of their mean words or actions .
The worst thing that you can do is to seek revenge by being mean to them . You get what you give . When you respond with meanness , anger , and hatred , you get the negativity that goes along with it . Usually , you only hurt yourself . Instead of seeking revenge motivated by anger and hate , seek an improvement motivated by a genuine desire to be the best .
The next time someone hurts your feelings don ’ t get mad — get better .