HEALTHY LIFESTYLE · OCTOBER 2018
6 POSITIVE
WAYS TO DEAL WITH GETTING REJECTED
If you got dumped or you didn ’ t get your dream job , here are some tools and insights to get you back on the wagon of awesomeness .
Getting rejected is a confidence assault on so many levels because it reduces you to below the level you were before you mustered the courage to try . Especially if you don ’ t see it coming , it can make you feel like you can ’ t trust your gut and , therefore , you should never try again . Well , I assume you ’ re waiting for the typical catch-phrases like , “ You can ’ t win if you don ’ t try .” But that would make me annoyed if I just got rejected , so I ’ ll skip that part .
Here are some tips to give you some grounding if this just happened to you .
DON ’ T TAKE IT PERSONALLY .
Just because someone didn ' t choose you doesn ' t mean they ' re right . That might sound like a mockery of your sanity , but getting rejected
1 only means that it wasn ’ t the right fit . It doesn ’ t mean that anything is wrong or lessthan about you . When it comes to love or a job , there ’ s one correct answer and it either is or isn ’ t you . If it isn ’ t you , that just is what it is — keep going until you find the one that ’ s a “ perfect fit .” It ’ s just a numbers game and the more you try , the more you hone your gifts , and the greater your chances of finding your happy . Usually when things don ' t work out it ' s because there ' s something perfect-er coming down the pipeline and we just had to collect one last lesson in order to get to it . Also , there ' s only one perfect and that takes its sweet time to arrive !
2
SQUEEZE OUT YOUR LESSONS .
A lot of the time it hurts so much that we turn it in on ourselves , believing that we got rejected because we weren ’ t good enough . Not so ! But a misalignment in what we expected and reality can reveal to us any areas that need our attention . When we go through rejection , there is a lot to be gleaned from examining what we thought . For example , if you got dumped and you didn ’ t see it coming , now ’ s the time to examine the signs leading up to this that you might have missed . There will be clear information that it ’ s up to you to excavate . It ’ s not about blame . It ’ s about milking this for all it ’ s worth . The most difficult experiences can become great gifts of growth and change — it comes down to a choice . Step out of the role of victim and keep your eyes focused on what it is you want more of in your life .
3
GIVE YOURSELF A BIG HIGH FIVE .
You just built some depth and character . I can tell you that the most boring people in the world are those who have never had anything bad happen to them . It ’ s like they don ’ t laugh as hard or enjoy food as much . When you go through the I-tried-my-best trenches , you come out with superpowers ! You learn and grow an immense amount of practical experience , not to mention , as a person , you grow deeper and more compassionate . It ’ s the hurtful lessons that build the most character . So , recognize that this growth is something that has happened for you , whether you can see it or not , and know that it ’ s not going to “ ruin ” you . Everyone thinks that their soul and spirit will somehow be tarnished forever . Nah , but it is going to suck for a while . Keep going through the motions of self-care and ensure you don ’ t perpetuate a depressed emotional state . This isn ’ t forever .
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