Health & Wellness Magazine Community Of Caring - Summer 2019 | 页面 19
intense positive experience leads us
to frame ordinary experiences as less
positive. Once you’ve landed a gold
medal or won the lottery, it’s hard to
take pleasure in finding a great parking
spot or winning a video game. Tom
was looking so hard for the perfect job
and the ideal country that he failed to
appreciate an interesting task and a
great restaurant.
Today, for the first time in more than
a decade, Tom reports being—and
appears to be—happy. Instead of
pursuing happiness alone, he fell in
love and got married. Rather than
evaluating his happiness daily and
hunting for his dream job, he’s finding
flow and experiencing daily satisfaction
in helping his wife set up a company.
He’s no longer bouncing around from
one continent to another, following the
advice of psychologists Ken Sheldon
and Sonja Lyubomirsky: “Change your
actions, not your circumstances.”
In Obliquity, John Kay argues that
the best things in life can only be
pursued indirectly. I believe this is
true for happiness: if you truly want to
experience joy or meaning, you need
to shift your attention away from joy
or meaning, and toward projects and
relationships that bring joy and meaning
as byproducts.
As the great
philosopher John
Stuart Mill once
wrote, “Those
only are happy
who have their
minds fixed on
some object
other than their
own happiness.”
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Adam Grant has been Wharton’s top-rated professor for six
straight years. He is a leading expert on how we can find
motivation and meaning and live more generous and creative
lives. He has been recognized as one of the world's 10 most
influential management thinkers and Fortune's 40 under 40.
He is the author of three New York Times bestselling books
that have sold over a million copies and been translated into 35
languages. Give and Take examines why helping others drives
our success and was named one of the best books of 2013 by
Amazon, Apple, the Financial Times, and The Wall Street Journal—
as well as one of Oprah's riveting reads and Harvard Business
Review’s ideas that shaped management. Originals explores how
individuals champion new ideas and leaders fight groupthink; it
was a NO.1 bestseller praised by J.J. Abrams, Richard Branson,
and Malcolm Gladwell. Option B, with Sheryl Sandberg, is a
NO. 1 bestseller on facing adversity and building resilience.
AdamGrant.net
19