There ’ s a limit to how fast you can make some things go . But like ignoring our limited lifespan , we like to ignore the reality that we can ’ t control or go more quickly than life goes .
Frustrated by it all , we instead multitask , jumping from project to project to give us the illusion that we ’ re moving forward and to often avoid slogging through the difficult middle periods of any project , where we get stuck , bored , or question what we ’ re doing . We look at our phones while eating dinner with our partners or sneak looks under the table because putting away our phones means having to listen to what our partner is saying .
It may be boring or difficult , and you can ’ t control the conversation , unlike your phone , where you ’ re in command . Your phone , Facebook , and Tik-Tok distractions aren ’ t the problem ; they ’ re bad solutions to the reality of life that we ’ d rather avoid .
Are there better ways to deal with our finitude ? Here are some suggestions to consider :
a ) Decide on what ’ s most important in your life
Burkeman tells a story attributed to Warren Buffet , but possi‐ bly an urban legend , where one of his employees asks for ad‐ vice on setting priorities . Buffet tells him to sit down and list on a piece of paper the 20 things he ’ d like to do in his life that he ’ s passionate about .
Then , he says , focus on the top five and absolutely avoid the next 15 . Why ? Because those 15 will be the things that will distract you from accomplishing the top five .
The point is that you won ’ t live forever , so you need to focus on what ’ s important and make those tough decisions . The word decide comes from the Latin decidere , meaning to cut off . Making a decision — what mate , what job — implies that something will be left behind . That ’ s okay ; that ’ s life ; you can ’ t do it all .
b ) Commit
The next step is to jump in with both feet . No , you don ’ t know if a marriage or a job will work out ; yes , it may be more diffi‐ cult than you imagined , but you can ’ t control the future . Don ’ t hem and haw , don ’ t distract , don ’ t do what-ifs . Time is running out .