Healing and Hypnotherapy Volume 7, Special Annual Issue, 15 June 2023 | Page 20

1 . Codependent behaviour
2 . Narcissistic tendencies
reclaiming , and reintegrating your inner child into your everyday consciousness . Here are the top five ways your wounded inner child may be sabotaging your life :

1 . Codependent behaviour

Codependency is what happens when we have no sense of our true needs , wants , and values . When we are out of touch with our authentic self and when we lack an identity , we can easily merge with others . Merging with others is dangerous because without personal boundaries or a self to inhabit , our relationships can become toxic , abusive , and one-sided . We start to depend on other people for our happiness and rely exclusively on them to fulfil our needs . The problem with deriving all of our emotional sustenance from others is that we can get used , abused , and hurt extremely easily . Our life becomes extremely unstable and our wellbeing is painfully delicate . In essence , those who suffer from codependency feel a sense of chronic endangerment . When you are completely dependent on something outside of you to give you a sense of identity , life understandably feels , and becomes , perilous . Codependency originates in childhoods that were violent , whether emotionally , physically , chemically , or sexually . Children of abuse learn to be
so hyper-vigilant and so externally-focused , that they lose touch with their inner selves . They fail to develop an identity because they ’ re too busy catering to other ’ s needs or protecting themselves from those around them . Codependency , in adulthood , often leads to extreme relationship dysfunction .

2 . Narcissistic tendencies

Those who were deprived of love , attention , and affection as children have a risk of developing narcissistic tendencies as adults . When we couldn ’ t depend on our parents or caretakers for our fundamental emotional needs to be met , we crave to fulfil that need as adults . Being starved of love often produces adults who have an insatiable need for attention , validation , and admiration . In adulthood , narcissistic tendencies manifest as never finding the ‘ perfect ’ partner , carrying the obsessive need to be admired or worshiped , inability to empathize with others or look beyond your own perspective , filling the empty hole inside with expensive material things , and using your own children to meet your need for love and approval .