3 They have trouble showing and communicating how they feel . You often wonder what they ’ re thinking or feeling and find yourself attempting to guess . It may sometimes seem impossible to know if they ’ re angry or hurt .
4 They don ’ t share their preferences , likes , or dislikes . You may feel like you don ’ t know this basic information about your loved one .
5 They ’ re conflict avoiders . They rarely disclose issues they ’ re having . Or , if a problem arises in your relationship with them , they have difficulty talking about it so issues go unaddressed .
6 When people around them openly express their feelings , they grow uncomfortable . They may freeze up ,
apologize unnecessarily , or leave altogether .
When parents ignore or reject emotions , the child learns that their feelings don ’ t matter . So , they do what they need to do to survive : wall off their emotions so they are not a burden to themselves or others .
While this may have been helpful in childhood and
the environment they lived in , they now live a life out of touch with the emotional world . They have difficulty identifying and understanding their feelings , their preferences , and what they need . Deep down , it feels like they don ’ t matter and are less valid than everyone else .
When folks with emotional neglect wall off their emotions , they unintentionally wall off essential aspects of who they are . They are then separated from their emotion , the deepest , most personal expression of who they are . They may appear fine to everyone else . But it ’ s just a matter of time before someone comes inside their house and notices the cracks .
What to Do if You Think Someone Has Childhood Emotional Neglect
1 Take an interest in who they are and validate what they have to say . Ask them questions and give them a chance to think about themselves for a change . This can guide them toward reflecting upon their own feelings , desires , and needs .
2 Offer support and compassion when there ’ s conflict . Remember that conflict is especially difficult for someone with emotional neglect . Use