word appeals to you – and examine the nature of it .
Ask questions such as :
• What am I feeling ?
• What thought is at the root of this feeling ?
• What evidence can I find against this thought / feeling ?
• What might be an alternative explanation ?
• What other options do I have ?
Be as open and curious as you can . You might even like to journal about your experiences with self-inquiry if it helps .
2 . Approach life with loving-kindness
When we examine the energy inherent in toxic assumptions , beliefs , comparisons , desires , etc . we see that it all stems from fear . This fear may be that we ’ re not enough , that we might miss out , that we may be hurt , that we may be abandoned – whatever the case , it ’ s all fear-based .
What is the opposite of fear ?
Answer : love .
Fear constricts and closes whereas love opens and expands .
In order to deprogram ego defence mechanisms we need to approach ourselves , other people , and life itself with lovingkindness . Yes , this is easier said than done , but remember that it takes time and practice .
Even the inability to approach life with loving-kindness can be approached with compassion . Can you be gentle with your lack of gentleness ? Can you forgive your lack of forgiveness ? Can you practice softness in the midst of hardness ?
3 . Be defiant and challenge yourself
You have the right to ask “ is that true ?” any time a thought about yourself or someone else arises .
By poking and prodding at the presumptions that emerge in your mind , you ’ ll be able to take away their power by undermining their