Guidebook | Page 68

MANAGING CARE( continued)

Self-Care, Health, and Respite
• Build in quality time for yourself— 1 to 1½ hours a day— and protect it.
• Keep up with your own needs, hobbies, and regular activities. Hold on to your own sense of self.
• Exercise. It leads to better sleep, decreased tension and depression, and increased energy.
• Eat a balanced, nutritious diet. Drink water.
• Recognize when you are stressed.
• Get enough rest.
• Take time to relax.
• Maintain a sense of humor.
• Get regular checkups and keep your own medical appointments. If you provide a lot of physical, hands-on assistance to your loved one, take particular care of your back. Ask a physical therapist for tips on lifting and see if there are assistive products that can help you or the person with the illness.
• Think about your future beyond the caregiving role. What goals do you hope to achieve, and how can you achieve them? Can your care recipient help you achieve them?
• Know your limits, set limits, and bring in outside help( family or paid worker) so that you can take a break.
Emotional Support and a Support Team
64
• You alone can do it, but you cannot do it alone. Caregiver or carepartner is an identity or role that you grow into.
• Share the care: Emotional support can be derived from obtaining physical and concrete help, as well as emotional help.
• Develop your coping skills, ways to express and release difficult emotions. Give yourself permission to feel sad, frustrated, or irritated— but also to enjoy. Try not to be critical of yourself in moments of anger. Give yourself credit, not guilt. Grieve. Laugh. Love. Hope. Forgive your mistakes. Focus on the present, the needs and rewards of the day. Use positive self-talk, such as“ I am doing a good job.” Know that it’ s okay to cry. Write about your experiences and feelings: Research shows that writing helps.
• Develop your emotional and spiritual support network, including your healthcare team( physician, nurse, social worker, rehab professionals), your family, friends, neighbors, support group and individual support group members, clergy, volunteers, and online support forums. Seek comfort from your faith, faith community, and spiritual practices. Find meaning, insight, understanding, and your own inner strengths. Adjust your expectations: Life and you are not perfect. Accept changes as they occur. Get help if necessary. Remember, it is a strength, not a weakness, to ask for help, including emotional help or counseling. Each person experiences depression in a unique way. It is important to take seriously any symptoms you experience that could signal depression. You should not feel embarrassed or ashamed. There are several core symptoms you should be aware of:
• Sleeplessness
• Loss of appetite
• Difficulty concentrating
• Feelings of hopelessness and worthlessness
• Feeling slowed down or restless inside
• No interest in once pleasurable activities
• Thoughts of death or suicide