- simple tips for setting effective -
Screen Time Limits
|by Kelly Bartlett
Too often parents take responsibility for
their kids’ screen-free time by structuring
activities for them. They think that if kids
are upset or bored without electronic entertainment, they must provide another activity for them to do. But this is just another
form of rescuing. When parents are quick to
step in with activities to distract kids from
boredom or anger about not having their
screens, they inadvertently rob children of
the opportunity to develop problem solving
skills and resilience.
Turning off the TV is a challenge for many
kids and families. Have faith in them to
work through this “suffering” to feel more
capable in managing their time. When you
have faith in your children to handle their
feelings, they will learn to have faith in
themselves, too.
It is important that parents do not make
children suffer, but sometimes it is most
helpful to “allow” them to suffer with support. Parents too often (in the name of love)
want to protect their children from struggle.
They don’t realize that their children need to
struggle, to deal with disappointment, and
to solve their own problems so they can develop their emotional muscles and the skills
necessary for the even bigger struggles they
will encounter throughout their lives.
When allowing children to suffer
...
1. Express empathy. “You are really angry
about not being able to play your video
game right now. I understand.”
2. Avoid lectures.
3. Do not rescue. It’s OK to feel upset.
4. Let them know you have faith in them to
figure out what to do.
When a child “suffers” because she can’t
watch the show she wants, allowing her to
endure this experience can help her develop
her resiliency muscles. She learns that she
can survive the ups and downs of life, as
well as the decision of what to do with her
time when there are no screens to watch.
The support parents can offer is to validate
her feelings, but avoid solving the ultimate
problem of what to do instead. Say, “I can
see this is very upsetting to you. It can be
19