from our publisher & editor
“Be mindful, even if your mind is full.”
~ De La Vega
by the time they walked down to meet the bus,
they were laughing and ready to take on the day.
As the autumn season settles in, many of us find
it to be a time of reflection. Taking stock of your
experiences can be just like the rest of parenting
– rewarding and challenging. Still, it’s worth your
time to look back on events and situations to see
how they’ve shaped whom you are as a person/
parent and how they’ve affected your child.
When she told me the story, of course, I
could relate. So we talked about how truly
life changing it can be to catch yourself in the
process of overreacting. And how the more
generally aware you become, you have the
chance of getting out in front of the freak-out
and stopping it before it happens. It doesn’t
mean you never lose your cool and scream at
your kids again. It means when (or after) it
happens, you let them know you’re not perfect
and that you would have liked to handle that
differently. This is one of the best lessons we can
teach our kids — it’s okay to make a mistake,
and you don’t have to stay in the same negative
space that started it.
It’s so easy to dwell on our faults or fret over the
situations we handled poorly: The frozen pizzas
on homework battle nights or the time we forgot
it was picture day and our kid went to school in
a “So Fast I’m Invisible” shirt. That happened to
you, too, right?
Minor goofs or big time fails — the bad stuff
is quick to come up. But what if it’s actually
more important to focus on what we did well?
Especially, the times we learned something new
that helped us turn a bad-parenting-day into a
great one.
Last week, our Creative Director, Amanda, had
an insane morning that led to her three children
each having a mini meltdown. Halfway through
the madness, Amanda paused and looked at
her kids to say, “Wow, this morning has been
nutters! Isn’t it crazy how we’ve all let it get to us?
It’s nobody’s fault — these things just happen.
How about we just take a deep breath and start
over?” Instantly, the situation was diffused, and
To me, this all comes down to mindfulness.
Ellen Langer, who has been called the Mother of
Mindfulness, says we are unaware of when we’re
mindless. She puts it in this paradoxical way,
“When we’re not there, we’re not there to know
we’re not there.”
So this fall, Amanda and I encourage you to
become more present. Turn off the autopilot
setting in your brain. Breathe deeply. Really taste
your food. Look into your child’s eyes when he
tells you a story. And be mindful… even when
your mind is full.
-Amity
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