Chores for Kids
- by age -
2. They help you. Next time you do the job,
you get to have an assistant.
3. You help them. Now it is their turn to take
the lead, and you are the assistant.
4. They do it alone. You’ve done this work together enough times that it is reasonable to
expect a child to get a job done on her own.
The length of time necessary for this 4-step
process varies. Getting the dog her food is
much less complicated than cleaning one’s
bedroom. For big tasks like that, it helps to
break the job up: Make the bed/ Put toys away/
Pick up clothes/ Vacuum/ Clear dishes/ Toss
garbage / Wipe surfaces. Each one is its own
learning process. That’s why it’s overwhelming to say to a child, “Clean your room,” and
expect it to be done both quickly and without
guidance. Teach your child how to do it well by
teaching in small steps, engaging cooperatively
with him, and giving him plenty of time to
develop this skill.
What if a child says, “No,” or argues when
it’s time to do chores? Your response is, “Yes,
let’s do it together.” Even when children have
previously been able to do tasks on their own,
sometimes they just need extra encouragement
or help. Break the job into, “You do this and I’ll
do that.” No arguing, negotiating, reasoning,
bribing or threatening necessary—just cooperation and some re-teaching. Your motto is,
“We do it together (until you can do it alone).”
the “when/then” approach
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What if a child is old enough to not need to be
re-taught how do to simple tasks and is more
than capable of doing them alone? The When/
Then approach is useful for moments like this.
“When the books are put back on the shelf,
then you may go to your friend’s house...When
the living room is picked up, then we’ll start
the movie…When the hamster cage is cleaned,
then you can go outside.” The When/ Then approach is not a bribe, as it does not offer kids a
reward if they do their work. It is about teaching kids that work is a necessary part of the
day and sometimes it has to come before the
fun stuff—it’s an order of events versus a conditional reward.
stay age appropriate
Here are some guidelines for the kinds of
chores kids are capable of handling alone at
different ages after dedicating some time to
teaching. The nature of these tasks is unique to
each child, family, and situation. When choosing chores for kids, be sure to take into consideration their individual needs and capabilities.
age 2-3
• Dust
• Wipe tables
• Wash fruit and
veggies
• Choose clothes
• Sweep
• Unload utensils
from dishwasher
• Help sort and load
laundry
• Put toys away
age 4-5
•
•
•
•
•
Set the table
Feed pets
Pair and fold socks
Shelve books
Water plants
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•
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Prepare food
Make the bed
Clear the table
Clean spills