Golden Greetings August 2014 | Page 38

CHUCKLE PAGE Grandparents Last Kiss Abbie loved to watch Grandma put on her makeup. About to leave after applying her lipstick, Abbie cried, "Gran, you forgot to kiss the toilet paper good-bye!" Aging Billy, 8, phoned to wish his Gran Happy Birthday. He asked how old she was and heard that she was 62. Stunned, Billy gasped, "Did you start at 1?" Sight of Fright The grandchildren were in bed and Gran changed into slacks and an old blouse to wash her hair. As the children became more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. Finally, with a towel around her head Gran stormed into their room with stern warnings. As she left the room, 3-year-old Winnie trembled, "What was THAT?" The Good Old Days Granny was telling Barbie, 6, what her childhood was like. "We used to skate outside on a pond, swing from a tyre in a tree, ride our pony and pick wild gooseberries in the woods." Enthralled, Barbie exclaimed, "I wish I'd known you sooner!" Young Author 4-year-old Suzette, diligently pounding away at Grandpa's computer, told him that she was writing a story. "What's it all about?" he asked. "I don't know," she replied. "I can't read." Torched Arriving at their holiday cabin late one night, Grandpa shepherded Billy, 8, inside, keeping the lights off to avoid attracting insects. Still, a few fireflies followed them in. Billy whispered, "No use Gramps, the mozzies are coming after us with torches!" Kids' Komments These have to be original. No adult is this creative! · STEVEN, 3, hugged and kissed his Mom good night. 'I love you so much that when you die I'm going to bury you outside my bedroom window.' · CLINTON, 5, was worried. Mom asked what was troubling him. He replied, 'What'll happen with this bed when I get married. My wife won't fit in it!' · MARC, 4, was engrossed in a young couple hugging and kissing in a restaurant. Without taking his eyes off them, he asked Dad: 'Why is he whispering in her mouth?' 37