POET THOMAS FULLER WROTE, ‘ALL
THINGS ARE DIFFICULT BEFORE THEY ARE
EASY’. AND SO IT IS WITH TALKING ABOUT
ISSUES THAT MAKE YOU FEEL INTENSELY
UNCOMFORTABLE.
7. FOCUS FORWARD
It’s easy to get pulled into ‘who
shoulda-woulda-coulda’ conversations,
stone throwing and name-calling. But
to what end? Keep your conversations
future focused. How would you like
things to be in the future? What needs
to start happening? What needs to
stop? Be as specific as you can. In the
interim, you may simply have to agree
to stay in dialogue and navigate the
best path forward.
You succeed or fail one conversation at
a time. My colonel friend’s experience
showed that engaging in conversations
that require us to lay our vulnerability
on the line can sometimes feel every
68
GLOSS JUNE 2015
bit as dangerous as laying our life on
the line. Even when, intellectually, we
know it’s not!
Which is why you need to trust in
yourself that if there’s something you
genuinely want to say, chances are
there’s someone who genuinely needs
to hear it. Your conversations have the
power not just to change lives, but to
change history — starting with your
own.
DON’T WAIT TO OOZE
CONFIDENCE BEFORE
YOU SHARE WHAT’S
WEIGHING YOU DOWN.