ties , you may both be required to sign paperwork . In such a case , a GGI in Germany recommends getting your ex ’ s power of attorney before moving , which will usually allow you to take care of these matters on your own . It may also be useful to have proof that your ex has left , particularly if you live in a country , such as Germany or France , which requires individuals to notify the authorities when they move abroad .
Children
Never do anything rash or erratic where children are concerned . Importantly , do not take your children out of the country without the proper authorization or without having given any court-required notice , or you could be civilly and criminally liable for child kidnapping . Such actions will weaken your custody arguments for judges in most European countries and in North America . Regardless of how your feel about your ex , most GGIs confirmed the impression of some of the legal experts we interviewed : courts and judges will always favor custody arrangements where both parents are involved in the children ’ s lives , so you will need to buckle down and deal with your ex at least until your children are old enough to do so on their own .
A GGI in the UK also advised getting creative when dealing with custody issues and informing the judge of differences in each country . For example , if you will be moving to a country with less holiday time than that of your ex and the judge requires your small child to be in your ex ’ s country for more time than you can afford , perhaps you can suggest that your ex comes to your country for visitation ( although you may have to pay for his tickets ). As one legal expert stated , “ It ’ s complicated with small children , but courts are open to reasonable suggestions .” Practically speaking , if your ex is not living in the same country as you and the children and you are the main caregiver , make sure that you have a power of attorney or the required legal equivalent for making decisions related to your children , such as school enrollment , medical procedures , child benefits and childcare .
Marry Well , Divorce Better
Unless you or your children are in danger , plan your exit carefully . In the words of one Boy Gone International , “ Don ’ t just rush into it . . . Take your time .” Think through the major issues discussed above before initiating any proceedings – indeed , before even talking to a lawyer . Also , start gathering any paperwork that you will need well ahead of time , especially if you do not have it with you . Relevant paperwork includes all financial and property statements , as well as any powers of attorney you may need from your partner .
“ This is a long and grueling process ,” says a GGI in Germany , so in addition to an exit strategy , you will also need a strong support network to help you through it .
Breaking up is never easy , and it is even more complicated when you are far from home . Keeping a level head , informing yourself on the major issues , and preparing ahead of time are the best defenses in such a stressful situation . And once it is all over , you can begin preparing for your new life .
If you need further assistance , Girl Gone International can put you in touch with an organization in your city .