GIRL POWER NOVEMBER 2013 | Page 10

Over half of adolescents and teens have been bullied online and about the same number have engaged in cyber bullying. More than 1 in 3 young people have experienced cyber threats online. Being an Assistant Principal at an all girls school, I’m sure you deal with the “mean girls.” The media has been spotlighting a high rate of students that are committing suicide due to cyber-bullying. In the effort to keep girls from reaching the decision to end their life, what can we do as supportive friends to recognize early warning signs? There is actually a new term for cyber-bullying that leads to suicide, it has been labeled bullycide. Bullycide is defined as suicide caused from the results of bullying through technology. Let’s talk more about what girls are dealing with before we talk about what we can do to be supportive and recognize early warning signs. If you don’t know what you are dealing with how can you recognize it? Over 25 percent of adolescents and teens have been bullied repeatedly through their cell phones or the Internet. Well over half of young people do not tell their parents when cyber bullying occurs. The Harford Country Examiner reported similarly concerning cyber bullying statistics: - Around half of teens have been the victims of cyber bullying. - Only 1 in 10 teens tell a parent if they have been a cyber bully victim. - Fewer than 1 in 5 cyber bullying incidents are reported to law enforcement. - 1 in 10 adolescents or teens have had embarrassing or damaging pictures taken of themselves without their permission, often using cell phone cameras. - About 1 in 5 teens have posted or sent sexually suggestive or nude pictures of themselves to others. - Girls are somewhat more likely than boys to be involved in cyber bullying. The Cyber Bullying Research Center also did a series of surveys that found these cyber bullying statistics: - Over 80 percent of teens use a cell phone regularly, making it the most popular form of technology and a common medium for cyber bullying. - About half of young people have experienced some form of cyber bullying and 10 to 20 percent experience it regularly. - Mean, hurtful comments and spreading rumors are the most common type of cyber bullying. - Girls are at least as likely as boys to be cyber bullies or their victims. - Boys are more likely to be threatened by cyber bullies than girls. - Cyber bullying affects all races. - Cyber bullying victims are more likely to have low self esteem and to consider suicide. As a friend here are some things that you can do. Encourage your friend to tell an adult if cyber bullying is occurring. Tell them if they are the victims they will not be punished and reassure them that being bullied is not their fault. If you read someone being mean ask them about it IN PERSON and talk to them. Encourage them to keep cyber bullying messages as proof that the cyber bullying is occurring. The teen’s parents may want to talk to the parents of the cyber bully, to the bully’s Internet or cell phone provider and/or to the police about the messages, especially if they are threatening or sexual in nature. Try blocking the person sending the messages. Miss Ohio 2012 Elissa McCracken has a great platform. As a teen girl that was cyber bullied and hid it from her parents for two years she realized how down it was getting her. She created her platform of Stop, Block and Tell. I think it is very important to encourage a friend you have to not respond, to block them and tell an adult. Here are some warning signs that may mean your friend is at risk and to look for: - Talking about wanting to die or to kill oneself. - Looking for a way to kill oneself, such as searching online or buying a gun. - Talking about feeling hopeless or having no reason to live. - Talking about feeling trapped or in unbearable pain. - Talking about being a burden to others. - Increasing the use of alcohol or drugs. - Acting anxious or agitated. Behaving recklessly. - Sleeping too little or too much. - Withdrawn or feeling isolated. - Showing rage or talking about seeking revenge. - Displaying extreme mood swings. - Preoccupation with death. - Suddenly happier, calmer. - Loss of interest in things one cares about. - Visiting or calling people to say goodbye. - Making arrangements. Setting one’s affairs in order. - Giving things away, such as prized possessions. Everyone has a “life lesson” they have learned. What would you say is your biggest “life lesson” and how has this made you a more confident woman today? Biggest life lesson. Wow this is hard for me because I think I have had several of them. I would have to say it came my senior year in high school. I was battling a lot of emotions that year. I was dealing with coming to grips on why I was adopted at age nine, the pressure of choosing a college, my traumatic childhood, anorexia and just pressure I felt from sports. I hit rock bottom, so much that my parents flew me to Texas to a Meier Clinic. I spent over 60 days of my senior year in that hospital. While we were in small groups I remember the counselor saying “one out of five of you will make the choice to face your demons and be successful in life, the rest of you will struggle and life will be hard.”