Getting Results Magazine Getting Results Magazine Fall 2017 - Page 13

deal that was not to our advantage. I was extremely upset. As I left the meeting to sit down with my two partners, I couldn’t help but notice that the three of us labeled the experience radically different[ly]. I was struck by how each of us used words that had such radically different levels of intensity and also how [our] experience of the event was radically different. How could it be that I was “angry” and “upset,” one of my partners was “furious” and “enraged,” and my other partner was “annoyed” and “a little peeved?” The word “peeved” itself “annoyed” me. I thought, ‘What a ridiculous word to describe what these people had done to us.’ It seemed stupid in my mind. I thought to myself, I would never use this word to describe how I was feeling…but then again, I had never been that calm in an unjust situation. I began to wonder, ‘If I did, how would I feel?’ Just to use the word “peeved” would probably make me laugh. It seemed so ridiculous. I began to notice the pattern of language that different people had and how their language patterns produced a magnification of their emotion or a softening of it. I decided to try a 10-day challenge with myself where I would first identify the emotions that I experienced most often that were most distressing and find a new word—a word that would soften or actually seem ridiculous—to break my own pattern of thought and feeling. I got my first opportunity after a long series of connecting flights, all of which were late. I arrived at my hotel at two in the morning, knowing I had to be up to speak at 8 a.m., and waited at the front desk for 10 minutes while the clerk searched for my name in the computer at a pace that would make a snail impatient. I felt the frustration gathering inside me; it started to build into anger, and I finally turned to the man, as I felt my intensity grow, and said, ‘I know this isn’t your fault, but right now I’m exhausted and I really need to get any room you can find for me because I’m starting to feel myself getting “a little bit peeved.”’ Just saying the word “peeved” by itself changed the tone of my voice and made the whole situation seem silly. The clerk looked at me perplexedly and then broke into a smile. I smiled back; my pattern was broken. As ridiculous and overly simplistic as this sounds, the simple replacement of the word I used within my own vocabulary broke my pattern. The emotional volcano that had been building up inside of me instantly cooled.” To change your life, you have to shift your emotional patterns. To shift your emotional patterns, you have to consciously select the words you’re going to use to describe how you feel. What would your life be like if you could take all your negative emotions and lower their intensity consistently? How much greater would the quality of your life be if you could intensify every positive experience you’ve ever had? u Looking for a dynamic speaker at your next event? Check Jim out at: Jim motivates people to achieve Breakthrough Results speaking on the following topics: · Why You Suck at Hiring – and What You Can Do About It! · Scaling Up: Mastering the new Rockefeller Habits 2.0 · You CAN Have a High-Performance Culture! · Get, Keep, Grow: Climbing the Ladder of Value and Engagement · Change Your Thinking to Change Your Results! · Greatest Coach Ever: What I Learned from Dean Smith, Roy Williams, Coach K, and Jimmy V · Accountability: The Secret to Success FALL 2017 | 13