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If you cannot help them, then it may be wise to talk to your friends or family so you can cry your heart out where she cannot see. Do not beg or cry in front of your girlfriend, however, and absolutely do not stalk her. 3) Learn how to control your feelings. Forget about self pity and instead work on the positive aspects of working things through with your ex. If you appear too needy, or if you come off as too desperate, your ex may end up avoiding you even more. 4) Keep the communication lines with your ex open. They may have ended the relationship, but you just need to make your ex feel like communication lines are open and that you want to be civil. You do not have to be the one initiating the conversation, but you should be willing to say hello and have a conversation occasionally with your ex, keeping in touch casually. 5) Above all else, analyze what went wrong with the relationship. There must have been a problem that led to the end of the relationship, so find out what the problem was if you want to get back together with your ex. Find out what caused the arguments, which of their needs weren't being met and work on rectifying those issues. How to Get Back Together with Your Ex in 3 Steps! You can find yourself falling into an emotionally depressed state, and you may find yourself wondering what to do. You may immediately feel like calling your ex and begging him or her to come back to you. But this is not really going to work in your favor. Rather than make things better, what it is probably going to do is make your situation much worse, chasing your ex away even further. What you should actually do at this point is the opposite of what you are feeling. Do you feel like calling your ex? Don't! Do you feel like staying inside and crying all day long? Don't! Instead, follow these three basic steps: 20