So how do you THINK ABOUT talibé with a different mentality?
1) Remind yourself, when you see them, that these kids never had a real childhood. They’ve been treated differently from other kids and exploited – sometimes abused – since age 4 or 5. They are children forced into the role of adults, finding food and caring for themselves. They are often uneducated and their future might look pretty bleak. Whatever attitude they project at you is a defense mechanism they’ve learned to survive a very harsh life.
2) If you feel angry or annoyed at what these boys say or do to you, try to redirect your anger towards the system and the adults who have put them into this life and made them act this way. Use that anger as fuel towards building projects that can help. It’s not the fault of the children.
3) The best response to a talibé’s demand for money is to greet him. Remind him that you’re a person, and recognize that he is, too. Shake his hand; ask his name and where he’s from.
4) If a talibé keeps asking for money and you don’t want to give, here are some things you can say: “Sorry, I don’t have change.” Or “Next time, inshallah!” If you want to make a joke out of it, you can add, “Sorry man, I’m really not ‘noosing’ these days… Times are rough!” Phrasing things this way won’t harm anyone and will make talibé feel acknowledged. Simply saying “no” or refusing to give is not how the culture works here. These kids won’t understand your deeper motivations behind this – they’ll just assume you are stingy, rude, or don’t care about them.
5) See a big pack of talibé coming your way? This used to intimidate me and I’d try to avoid it, but now I try to look at is as another chance to remind them that we don’t think they’re invisible or distasteful. Give them a smile and a greeting, or at least a wave and eye contact, as you walk through. You don’t have to stop and be surrounded – that acknowledgement is enough.
6) If a talibé insults you or makes a joke at your expense, either ignore it or make a joke back. Getting angry will not result in behavior change.
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