Where do I go?:
Perspectives
T
TOM FOOLERY
PART ONE
The biggest question on every skateboarders mind, I feel is, "Where do I go?"
You go where ever you feel like. Follow your heart. As cheesy as the saying is, it holds true no matter what situation you apply it to. For example, my heart chose to bring me to Ohio. My initial reasoning for the move was regrettable, to say in the least. However, I quickly found out that it was the right move for me and the most enlightening experience I could have brought upon myself. I bounced from Columbus, to Cleveland, and finally ended up in Akron.
In Columbus, I made a friend while I was driving around, trying to find Soldiers of Downhill. He was a hitch-hiker just trying to find his way home to his family. I can't remember his name, but I'll always remember his story. Even to this day, I look back on that day and think about how glad I am that I chose to stop rather than just drive by and think nothing of it. He told me about his daughter and his mother and how they passed away in a car accident. He walked away without a scratch though and he was the one driving. His guilt drove him to take on the life of a true vagabond. Was it insanity or just a crazy amount of "heart"? I chose to interpret it as the latter.
In Cleveland, I began to struggle. Fresh out of a relationship with a girl I had been good friends with since grade school, I plummeted. Sinking deeper into depression, darkness and an alcohol fueled rebellion, I lost my heart. I couldn't clear my mind of where I was to see where I was going. It finally brought me to a crossroads I never thought I'd end up at. I had just barely, but luckily, escaped a terrible car accident, totalling my truck and landing me in a jail cell. I had become the person I told myself I would never be, a drunk driver. I faced a hard road ahead of rehabilitation, sobriety and some serious reflection while still battling depression and consistent thoughts of ending my life.
a hard road ahead of rehabilitation, sobriety and some serious reflection while still battling depression and consistent thoughts of ending my life.
While I was in Cleveland, attending to court ordered duties, working at a pizza shop and trying to keep my head above water, I made two more friends through skateboarding; Dan Meehan and Megan Seibyl. We found time to skate with each other and share what we knew about life and skateboarding. They taught me to enjoy each day so that it might make tomorrow better. They taught me that optimism wasn't such a ridiculous idea and that smiling wasn't so painful. Megan and Dan are both associated with The Longboard Club (TLC) out of Ohio State University. Megan is actually the TLC's fearless leader. I am forever greatful for their friendship.
After my brief stint in Cleveland, I hopped over to Akron. I was sober now for 6 months and counting and skating harder than ever. I felt, at first, that my move to Akron was taking me farther away from where I was supposed to be even though my heart was saying something different. My heart was right, of course. I found a new extension to add to my family in Akron through Sun Valley Sports. Lily Armington, Jennifer Lynn, Isaiah Williams, Jonathon Smith and Brien Croff gave me a place to be myself. They made me feel like I had purpose again. I attended a slide jam they hosted in Akron and was asked shortly after to join the team. Things weren't so bad now, but still very difficult.
If You Are Feeling Suicidal...
When you’re feeling extremely depressed or suicidal, your problems don’t seem temporary—they seem overwhelming and permanent. But with time, you will feel better, especially if you reach out for help. If you are feeling suicidal, know that there are many people who want to support you during this difficult time, so please reach out for help!
Call 1-800-273-TALK in the U.S. or visit Befrienders Worldwide to find a helpline in your country.