before speaking again. "You're all I have left, you know, Annie is gone. Noah is happy, I am happy for him. But, I’m not strong enough to do this alone."
You aren’t alone, I wanted to cry out, I’m right here. I always have been. But it didn’t matter any longer, his mind was set.
The quietness overwhelmed us, and for a moment the wind that howled around ceased to be beautiful anymore, but instead was terrifying. "You’ve been such a loyal companion, keeping my family safe and warm for years. I know you can’t hear me… but I hear you. I know you love us as much as we have loved and appreciated you. And now I must leave you. And I'm so sorry."
I wanted to reply. I wanted to cry out with him, and hold him and remind him that it was okay, we would be okay.
The old man stared out into the sea, letting the ocean breeze caress his face. We were both silent, the winds had stopped now and the only noise was the gentle sound of his breath.
And then he leapt. It was so fast that I hadn't realized he'd even gone. All I knew was that in that moment, I had never felt more alone.
~~~
After Simon’s death many people came, police officers, ambulances . . . Noah. The only reminder of a life that seemed so perfect. There was chaos for a while as everyone tried to realize what happened. People investigated, tore apart his home. Was it a murder or a suicide they all kept asking me. I wanted them to leave, this was my family and they were invading their space, their privacy. Noah was crying, and I wanted so badly to hold him to remind him that I was still here for him. But I couldn’t. He took as many belongings of theirs as he could, and then the rest was sold or thrown away. With each piece of furniture and each belonging I felt my light dim more and more. There was nothing left of them, nothing left of my family, nothing but my memories. The chaos dimmed and everyone left but I was left with silence.
Waves crashed against me, storms brewed in the distance, and months passed.
I wanted to scream and cry. I wanted to listen to one more story, one more tale. I wished I could tell someone of his life. I wanted someone, anyone to know of this amazing man. But I was and am stuck here, all I can do is wait. I wait for the visits from Noah’s family. I wait for my new keeper, I wait for anything other than now.
Alas, I am still here, weathering the winds and fighting storms as they pass over the bay. With each boat passing, I am less and less hopeful of my future.
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