Flumes Vol. 3: Issue 1 Summer 2018 | Page 78

For the Man Who Colonized My Body

By Hinnah Mian

my mother tells me of how

her homeland was once

taken over by those who

felt as though they

were entitled to it

simply because she

wasn’t pretty enough

to call it her own

i can’t tell if its my

memory or hers

when i see the

stare of a soldier

holding his gun as

if its bullets

belonged in my body

as much as i

was supposed to belong

on this soil

she tells me we are

blessed to have two homes

on both ends of the world

and i tell her it is a curse

to not belong to

either of them

my mother tells me of howdisappointed she was in mewhen i had my landget taken over bya man who felt as thoughhe was entitled to itsimply because i was toopretty to not share ithe left his marks on methe way the bombsleft their marks onmy mother’s hometownwhen she was learning

how to be a little girlin the comfort of herown bomb sheltershe tells me of howshe was taught toavoid the men marchingaround with big gunsand uniforms becausethey always seem tohave a hand onthe triggeri tell her it ishard to avoid themwhen nowadayseveryone seems toconceal their weaponsmy mother tells methe biggest regretshe ever hadwas to let her countryget taken over bythose who can’t evenseem to recognizeits beautyshe doesn’t seemto realize ithurts the sameeven as theywhisper “you’reso beautiful”when they areconqueringyour body

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