T
he woman I thought I’d be would always be having dinner
parties, because her house would always be spotless and
ready for company, and because she knew she’d impress.
I’d remove my handmade apron, made from heirloom
material that I sewed together with organic thread and
adorned with vintage pearls, and set out the personal place
cards I’d crafted for each guest – at each place setting freshly
polished silverware and a wine glass I’d pour 3 oz of carefully
paired wine into with each course.
I thought wrong.
The woman I am has friends over each Tuesday night to watch
“Drunk History” on Comedy Central, eat a delicious meal
my husband prepares, and throw back a couple bottles of
whatever wine was on sale at Martha’s Vineyard, all while still
wearing the clothes I went to the gym in earlier.
The only aspect of my weekly dinner party that is actually on
par with the lifestyle I once pictured is the tastiness of the
food – because that’s just something you can’t compromise
on. And since I’m usually not the one to make it.
Each Tuesday my husband Mike makes horseradish crusted
tilapia (tilapia brushed with lemon juice, flour, horseradish,
mayonnaise, salt and pepper), wasabi shrimp (battered and
fried shrimp tossed in a mayonnaise and wasabi glaze), and
roasted asparagus for a gathering of friends and neighbors
before we settle in to watch the show.
There are no place cards, to say the least. The dishes don’t
match, the napkins are paper, and presentation is, shall we
say “rustic?” Sometimes I haven’t cleaned the bathroom that
particular week, and my guests have some dirty clothes in the
corner or toothpaste gunk on the sink to look forward to when
nature calls.
But there is lots of talk, lots of laughter, and an opportunity to
connect with friends, let our hair down a bit, and enjoy a funny
show to make sure that we all aren’t taking life too seriously
as we carry out the work week.
In case you’re not familiar, “Drunk History” was a concept
that started on YouTube, produced by “Funny or Die.” It’s
simple: the producers ask an intoxicated person to discuss an
historical event. Actors costumed in historically accurate gar ??X??] H]?[?^X? H\? H ?[??\??X[?\??X?\?] ?]?[?[?][?? ?? ?Z?K8?'YXZ [? [?H???Z?K ]8?&\??? H??\??Y[? ???????Y^\??X?]\?H ?x?&\?HZ?H[??HX\? H NL ?[?H?\??\?Y ??'B??[?\?Z[?[?? ?]?? ?[??\??B??]?[??YH?[??H ??]? \ ?]??Y[? ??\?[??\???Y??H H ????Y?[??[??Z[??X?H ????] [H[??]Y? ?[H H ???\??XZ?\? H^ \?Y[??H]X??Y??\?[? [?] ??[?H ?]?[??]?H^H?\??YK??[??Kx?&[H?Y ?]?H??\?Y^H??[?\?Z[?[??^ X?][???? ?H]?[ ?\?Hx?&[H??Y??X?H[??][????Y[? ??\? ?Y?\?\??????[?X??X?? \?\? B???][??^H?YHZY? ?H] H [YK????] [??N??\??YH??Z?\?B???X?]\?H]8?&\??X?H]8?$? H ?YZ?? ?[? ?x?&\?H?\?H[??\??Y??][?]?\?][?? ?Y[\? ??H[?\?\??^H\?H H ?YZ??[? ?H?YY??\[?H H[?? ??H?YYH??\H??\????? ???Z[??X??]YX\?\?[?? \[? ?[??XY?\?]Y??[?X] ??[?H??&] [??]?[????\[?H?\? ??[?HH ?Y? ??\?\??Y??^H?\?[?H\?X?\?Y ??[?^?Y [???\?Y ?[???x?&[H ?\?H ??YY^HH ?[?[? H ?\??\??\?[? [YH ? ?\??[ ?\??\?H[?^ ]Z\?]H X?H[?[??XZ?H \???[^?Y X?B??\? ?[?]?H]?\?H[???^H?YH[??\??Y??H?Y\? ?]?\? ?[?[? H????H?H?? ????]?????