First A Nurse: No Matter Where, No Matter What | Page 5
The phone rang early on that Sunday morning in January
2011. It was Rick’s surgeon, calling about his biopsy report.
When he brought his wife to the phone, so they could hear
the news together, that’s when they heard those three little
words no one ever wants to hear: “You have cancer.” The
diagnosis: prostate cancer, moderate aggressiveness. He was
only 57 years old.
It was an excruciatingly long wait until Rick’s surgery two
months later. After surgery, his cancer was gone—but so
were some other vital bodily functions that most healthy men
take for granted. He experienced complete incontinence and
complete erectile dysfunction. The devastation of his physical
condition led to many sleepless nights. “Prostate cancer is
not a man’s disease, it’s an ‘us’ disease,” says Brenda Redner.
Through it all, Rick had the support of his wife, who is
also a Spartan Nurse. They went to numerous medical
appointments as they kept searching for answers and gaining
knowledge of various research in men’s health. Assisting with
choosing the best treatment was part of their story. Finding
the treatment with the least negative outcomes was the goal.
“I didn’t know it then, but the news about my husband’s
cancer diagnosis would lead to the challenge of my life.”
New Depths of Understanding
Cancer Patients
At one point in her nursing career, Redner had worked
in oncology. And the most rewarding aspect was caring
for cancer patients and their families—providing not only
the physical and medical care, but also attending to their
emotional and psychological needs.
“My husband’s diagnosis of prostate cancer has given me
so much more regard for every person dia gnosed with
cancer. This experience has taken me to a new depth of
understanding that I had never known before,” she says.
Caring for the Whole Person
“I recall that MSU’s nursing application asked us to describe
our philosophy of nursing. I remember my response; I felt
it was important to look at the whole patient—not only the
physical, but also the emotional, psychological, social, and
religious aspects. After I was accepted into the program,
I learned that this was also the MSU nursing program’s
philosophy,” she says. “I still believe it today. You really have
to care for the whole person.
“After the surgery, dealing with my husband in complete
incontinence kicked in my nursing skills. Dealing with
complete erectile dysfunction forced me to do research
and become a helper in all aspects of his care.”
After one year, the incontinence issue was resolved. After
five years, they found a solution for the erectile dysfunction.
Together, they have written two books, I Left My Prostate in
San Francisco—Where’s Yours?: Coping with the Emotional,
Relational, Sexual, and Spiritual Aspects of Prostate Cancer;
and Everything You Never Wanted to Know about Erectile
Dysfunction and Penile Implants: End Your Silence, Sadness,
Suffering and Shame.
“Our hope is that other families touched by prostate cancer
can see how important it is to keep going, to learn resilience,
to not give up.”
“You Have Cancer”
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