FHSTheFlash The Flash Volume 47, Issue 8 May 2007 | Page 2

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explains
Annie it all
By Annie Scaramuzzino

Assistant Editor
Before I began writing this article, I checked my Myspace. If I get writer’s block
sometime during writing, I will, again, check my Myspace, and when I am finished, I will,
yep you guessed it, check my Myspace.
Hi, my name is Annie Scaramuzzino, and I am a Myspace addict.
You may laugh, but many of you are laughing because you’re in the same boat. Myspace
now consumes a huge part of our lives, and most Myspacers don’t even realize it.
We fight on Myspace, and we flirt on Myspace. Instead of “I called you yesterday”, it
has become “I commented you yesterday”. Students break the rules and download proxy
servers on school computers just so they can check their Friend Requests during the day.
We spend hours taking mirror shots, perfecting our layouts, and finding the perfect
song. When a friend takes us off of their Top 8, we worry they are mad at us. When our
boyfriend doesn’t comment our new picture, we get upset.
We have become a generation of Myspace minions, and Tom is our leader.
So what’s with the addiction? As teens, we need something to do, some way to spend
our time. Because our minds are still developing, and we’re still finding out who we are,
teenagers are often easily influenced into becoming addicted to things like drugs or alcohol,
but what about websites? Adults report Myspace as dangerous because it promotes child

On the outside...
Hello readers in reader-land, I called you in here because there’s something I really
think we should all talk about together. Don’t worry your not in trouble I promise, there’s
just some things I want to talk about with you. Man-to- reader o.k.? We’re both young
and hip and cool and awesome and sweet right? Yeah of course… yeah… right? Ok cool,
let’s get down to business.
You see, I went to a couple formal dances with you, you remember right? We all got
dressed up all nice, went out to dinner, took countless pictures with our parents and
perspective dates, it was a good time right? Then we rolled up to the dance in our party
buses, limos, and mom’s minivans with a general feeling of excitement for the festivities
to come and it was a good time right? Then we all went out on the dance floor and there
was that initial first five minutes of awkwardness before the actual dancing started, and
then BAM! Left, right, slightly to the left, pressing against your back, everybody was abumpin’ and a-grindin’ and it was a good time right? Of course it was, we all had fun and
continued to for the rest of the night. But how long is this fun gonna go on guys? I mean
the “bump and grind”
Don’t get me wrong, I’m a firm supporter of the B/G (bump and grind), it’s a swell
time. But how long are we feasibly going to be able to keep the B/G alive? More importantly,
what happens when we’re all old and don’t know how to do anything but rub up against
each other, and we have things like weddings and bar mitzvahs? And what about the 4
guys and 3 girls in the school who have potential to go to some type of prestigious upper
class charity ball later on in life? WHAT WILL THOSE SEVEN PEOPLE DO?

It’s not that I want to kill the B/G but I think there will be a time to retire it. Think of the
B/G like those stupid beanies with propellers on it; you can wear it until a certain point,
but right after that point you just look stupid and all your friends laugh at you. For
propeller hats, the expiration age was 5. For B/G I’m going to call an even 31. Mainly
because that leaves you plenty of time between college, those odd
years after where you actually do grow up, and being 30
because as I understand it everything else just
completely downhill from there. The
difference between the rules of B/G and
the propeller hats, is instead of looking
stupid by wearing a hat with a
propeller, you just look
undeniably creepy by
dancing in such a
lewd manner. And
nobody wants to
be the creepy
person at the
party. Not
even the actual creepy guy at the party. But he can’t help it, it’s his nature.

Keep on Rockin in the Free World,
Your Friend
Kyle T. Snarski
(The T is for “That one time instead of actually having a word that started with the letter “T” he
just typed some abnormally long sentence that went nowhere and contained 13 T’s including that
last one, so I guess his name should be Kyle TTTTTTTTTTTTT. Snarski if things were to properly
correspond with actual “T” amounts.)

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predators; I report the site dangerous because it is yet another
thing teens are prone to becoming addicted to.
For those who have worked up the courage to delete their
Myspace, I commend you. For those who have never taken
the time to create one, I advise you not to start. Somewhere
along the line, Myspace attached onto us at a party or at a
friend’s house, and we’ve been unable to rid ourselves of it
ever since. That is, until we go to college, then we can just get
a Facebook.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I think I’ve got New Messages.

What’s Up, Doc?
From the desk of Dr. Dave Richards

It’s hard to believe we just said goodbye to the Class of
2007 with a successful Senior Walk and Commencement
Ceremony at Freedom Hill. As I look back on this school
year, I immediately have thoughts of all of the positive events
and celebrations that we experienced in the arts, athletics,
and academics. Our FHS Band and Vocal Music program
once again demonstrated that they are H8