I didn’t choose my birth family. But if I could have, I would still choose the family that I was born into because they are the most incredible, caring and loving people. I have learned so much from watching my parents’ relationship and admire the way they raised me and my siblings. My parents taught me at a very young age that they
would always support each other’s decisions
and were a solid team that cannot be torn apart. They respectfully put their relationship before their children, supported each other endlessly, but still gave my siblings and I all the love and support that we could ever need. I knew they loved us as children, but I also knew that the love between them was something very unique and special. My parents’ relationship has been a great model for me because I learned at a very early age what a healthy marriage is like, and continue to learn from it. My parents are now celebrating over 37 years of marriage.
My husband and I just celebrated our four-year wedding anniversary. Getting married is an enormous decision, but for me, it was the easiest one I ever made because it was a decision that was my own and I was not just “thrown” into the situation. I look forward to every moment of everyday that my husband and I spend together and look forward to a lifetime of happiness that we have chosen to create together. When I met my husband, I felt like I was already at home and knew that he was “the one” from the moment I laid eyes on him. I always enjoy saying that we did not fall in love, we flew.
It’s the beginning of a new chapter when you begin a life together in marriage. You become the other half of your partner and blend the two family histories to create a version of your own to become your own family. Choosing how we want to spend our time, money, the food we eat, and so on, are all decisions that my husband and I are able to make together.
Now that my husband and I have our “own” family, we are going into it with our heart wide open and have the benefit to take the “best of” everything that we have learned from our parents and in-laws, and their version of what family means to them. It’s incredible to think that this is how family can be made.
While of course there are always exceptions, you don't choose your parents or siblings, you don’t get to choose your children, nor do you get to choose your children's spouse or your grandchildren. The only family member that you have the ability to truly choose is your spouse and I’m grateful I chose wisely.