FLM: In what ways has your relationship with your husband changed since retiring from the NFL?
DF: That’s a very loaded question. Transitioning out of the NFL has many roads for many different players and their spouses. Our roles have shifted since him being out of the game. Matt being home and not going out to play was probably a larger shift for him than me just because leaving a locker room full of brothers every day is a big deal. Honestly, we were very blessed to not have a tumultuous transition out of the game. There was grief of course coming out of NFL life after 10 years but we kept a lot transparency with one another. We planned as much as possible for that transition. Weekly date nights have always been a staple throughout his entire career and even now just to keep us connected. Also, we checked in a lot about where his head space was while in the game. We were very blessed for him to retire the game and not let it retire him. In this season I feel closer to him than I ever have. He is truly my best friend and I can say that with even more confidence today than when we first got married. We communicate far better because we do so with intentionality. We just simply have fun and make clear what our priorities are.
FLM: As parents how do you and Matt aim to display your relationship as well as yourselves on an individual level to your children?
DF: Matt and I try to mirror a healthy relationship to them. We want them to know all of the love displayed coupled with our failures and how we love each other through those. If we disagree, we don’t always try to make it private. We want them to understand what a healthy way of approaching conflict looks like. It’s not about screaming or slamming doors. It is about having a difference of opinion and having a respectful conversation about it. On the other hand, we want them to witness what a great love looks like. They get annoyed with our PDA or dancing to any music together, but I’m convinced they secretly love it. Individually we really want them to know who we are and the experiences we have had. One of the greatest gifts our parents gifted us was intentional time. Matt and I both know so much about our parents and their experiences because they spent intentional time with us. We want to do the same with our children. We want them to enjoy our company as much as we enjoy theirs.