She is the fourth kid out of seven siblings and when she was seventeen years old, my grandpa passed away, one year later my grandma died. She was forced to quit school in order to support the family despite always being the best student in her class. In post 60’s China, there was much poverty, which was even more extreme for a big family with seven kids and no parents. As the “middle kid” in the family, she needed to learn how to balance work and caring for the younger ones. However, whenever she talks about the past, she always emphasizes what she has learned from the difficult time and always focuses on the bright side of life.
Her life didn't treat her softer after marriage. In late 80's China, a girl child was not really appreciated. I was born in 1988. My mom was expected and somehow forced by my grandparents to have a second birth even though everyone knew it was not legal during that time as China had a strict “one-child policy”. She was pregnant again when I was six years old but what I remember was that she “disappeared” for quite a long time and came back with my sister in her arm. Later I learned that she was at my uncle’s home for eight months and gave birth to my sister there until my father “solved” everything at home to avoid ending up in prison. However, it was again a girl, which brought her a lot of fights and arguments later on with my grandparents. She laughs about all of this when she tells the story because she eventually won all the “debates”.
The more I form my own values and views about life, the more I appreciate my hero mom’s attitude. Such as when I told her I would follow my husband to Germany, she was really supportive and let me know there is always a home in China for me and I should just go and enjoy my own life. Or like in this global pandemic, my father’s company went bankrupt as his company was not linked to digitalization and was not able to survive in such a disrupted business situation. When my father was really down and sitting around, my mom converted a room at home to a gym and forced my father and my sister to do sports every morning with her. It was amazing to see how great they looked after four months of lockdown when most others were basically gaining weight!
For me, this extreme positive power to enjoy life and always work hard and keep being a better self is why my mom is truly my hero. As I honor my mom, I also wish all moms everywhere a “Happy Belated Mom’s Day! You are truly our heroes!!!”
y mom is an
ordinary Chinese
woman who is
only 160cm height. But, what is not ordinary out of such a small body, is her giant universal positive power! My German husband can always be cheered up by just listening to my video calls with my mom, even though he basically understands nothing. He tells me often that he doesn’t know how people can be laughing non-stop for an entire two-hour call. And I can always feel “stress-free” after talking to my mom which reminds me of the slogan “life can be a bitch, we just need to make love harder, the rest is simply enjoying!”
What I learned from the writer Mark Manson is that “extreme positive attitude normally comes from extreme sufferings in life”. My mom’s life has not been an easy one.
M