Are you and your man ready to take things to the next level? No, I’m not talking marriage, I’m talking vacation! You’ve been together for a little while now and you seem to get along great, so what better way to test your relationship, than spending a slew of days together on a trip! This is where things can get real.
Before you go, there are some thoughts to consider. Pay attention to how you plan. How do you decide where to go? How much to spend? What activities, or lack thereof, you want to do? Notice how you make these decisions. Do you take the reins or does he? Are you both planners, just one or neither one of you? How do you handle any disagreements around any of these travel logistics? The key here is to notice how you each manage any differences in opinion.
How do you respond to differences? To have a happy and successful relationship you don’t have to share the exact same interests, what’s more important, is how you navigate any gaps between your ideas. When excitement around being on vacation starts to mount, notice if you are both respectful of the others wants for the trip and be respectful. Listen for what seems to be important to each of you. Often times, it’s difficult for people to speak up, especially if you don’t want to “make waves” so it’s great to create space for ideas to be heard and considered. Then see if you can come to a middle ground. Compromise can be tricky enough but it can’t even begin without really listening. This is a great practice and will benefit your relationship in the long run.
How you maneuver through planning a trip, can be a sign of things to come and can give you a glimpse into how you might plan together in the future. If you stay on the lookout for opportunities to listen, be respectful of any differences of opinion and compromise, you will be sure to come back even stronger as a couple than before you left. If these things prove difficult for each of you to do, it might be time to jump ship!
Bon Voyage!
Navigating the
"Trip Test"
and
What It Says About Your Relationship
By Erika Fay LMFT