I have learned that one of the most trying parts of any relationships is to be vulnerable, especially with your feelings. I am a naturally guarded and selective person when it comes to what I will and will not share and with whom, but recently I have come to realize and accept that in order to foster deeper relationships with people, a certain level of vulnerability and openness is necessary. I have always viewed vulnerability and openness as a weakness ready to be exploited, and although in some circumstances that may be true, I have found that my vulnerability has fostered strength in myself and my various relationships.
Recently, I had to handle a persistent issue in one of my relationships and one that many may find relatable; the whole “you
hurt my feelings and here is why” talk with a good friend. If you have never been in this situation, let me personally tell you how lucky you are because it is uncomfortable, awkward, and complicated. First, being open and admitting to yourself that you have an issue with a good friend is already challenging, but then to top it off you have to tell them or else your friendship may continue to worsen. It is terrifying. Although it is scary, by doing it I got a huge weight off my shoulders and he finally got some insight into how I was feeling, which is something he doesn’t get often. But even more than that, on some level we are closer. By being vulnerable with him, he knows that 1.) I trust him and 2.) that I am comfortable enough to be honest and hopefully he feels that he can feel that same about me. I would never choose to relive that situation or that conversation again, but I’m proud of myself. That situation was only one of many uncomfortable and stressful, yet rewarding, scenarios I have encountered with my friends. As a result, my friends and I have only gotten closer because of the honesty we each displayed.