One of my all time favorite films is, “Love Actually,” with its nine intertwined stories that examine the complexities of the one emotion that connects us all: love. In the film, you witness unrequited love, love from afar, lost love, found love, puppy love, budding love, crushed love and more. There are countless scenes that warmed my heart and countless others that made me cringe with empathy. Consider when Emma Thompson’s character excitedly opens her Christmas present expecting to see the exquisite necklace with ruby adorned gold heart pendant that she accidentally discovered in her husband’s pocket one day. Imagine her surprise when instead she finds a CD of her favorite songstress, Joni Mitchell. You can feel her devastation as she realizes that necklace went to her husband’s sexy secretary and what that means for her marriage and family. Or the magical scene where Keira Knightley’s new husband’s best friends silently serenades her with poster board size flash cards professing his love, while understanding he must walk away. True, Love Actually is a Christmas movie, but love stories like this one are timeless and suitable all year round.
We all dream of love for our future. A reading from the Bible popular at weddings (including my own),
“Love is patient, love is kind ... It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”
Except love does fail. Love can be anything but kind, full of anger and much self-seeking; all the things the Bible promises it isn’t. Whether it’s wonderful or awful, I think we can all agree love is complicated. And celebrating love as we do on Valentine’s Day can actually hurt a relationship more than help. It seems people may value their level of love by the price tag they put on the gift. And did you know that February 13th is actually known as Mistress Day? Yes, it seems that cheating partners feel like they have a hall pass on the day before the actual so long as they show up on February 14th. I also once read that February 15th is the day most women sign up for cheating sites like Ashley Madison, whose tagline is “Life is short, Have an Affair.” When romance fails on the ONE day of the year it’s supposed to be perfect, women are willing to look outside the marriage to get their “hearts” filled.
This month’s FLM contributors share their experiences with the darker side of love, but you’ll also get a healthy dose of inspiration and hope on the topic of self love. Sometimes loving and being loved in all the wrong ways, is the only path to real lasting love in all the right ways and it starts with loving the reflection in the mirror.
Editor's Note
Michele
Fete Lifestyle Magazine