There have been times in my life where my bank account was flush. It was those times that I had a blast buying lots of gifts for my family and friends. Sometimes it would be one expensive gift, like the first generation Kindle I bought my boss one year. Or it might be more about abundant giving like the first Christmas that I hosted my family as an adult, that just happened to be in Las Vegas. My mom, aunt and grandmother all drove or flew in from out of town and stayed with me. The tree was tinseled and twinkling with colorful lights, showcasing the wrapped boxes I’d placed bountifully underneath. I took such pride in buying, wrapping, and displaying those packages. And when morning arrived, I beamed with pride as they gleefully opened their presents.
I’ve learned over the years that there is a true art to gift-giving and that it is not about how much you spend or how many items you bring, but the thought you put into it. The key word is GIVING. Sadly, Christmas has become a holiday about giving and getting money and material objects. It’s about who gives the best or spends the most. And it’s about making and keeping a list of who forgot or gifted wrong, so you can be sure to give them a taste of their own medicine next year.
Instead, I believe this should be a holiday about coming together if you’re able, and giving of yourself, whether it is your time, your attention, or yes, maybe a gift or two to a loved one. It doesn’t have to cost much or anything at all. You can give your time by showing up for family, by helping out a friend, or by volunteering for causes that you might hold dear. The real point should be how you can be generous of spirit, more than generous of pocket.
Some of my favorite gifts have been those thoughtful surprises that let me know I touched someone’s heart. One of the biggest surprise gifts I ever received was as a young attorney at my first job out of law school. A partner I worked for had a lovely secretary named Anne who was always very helpful to me, especially in getting this partner’s work to him looking better than I could with my less than stellar word processing skills. One year, she gifted me with a giant poinsettia plant. She told me that every year she gives out 10 plants to someone that made her