Most days, I wake up with a sense of purpose, and I’m excited for my time alone and celebrating new milestones in my home gym. But there are mornings when the world seems too much, and I’m so tempted to hit the snooze or fire up a social media site and self-flagellate at the state of the world. Sometimes I give in to that urge, but more often, when the doubt creeps in, I turn to a metta meditation to get me back on track.
I’ve written before about this meditation practice, also known as loving-kindness meditation, and it’s deceptively simple. You begin with the phrases:
May I be healthy.
May I be safe.
May I be happy.
May I live with ease.
Begin by thinking about yourself, then someone you are close to, and ultimately, others you are not close to (maybe even people you don’t understand or find problematic,) and eventually, sending that loving-kindness out into the world. I first learned about this technique from meditation pioneer and teacher Sharon Salzberg. While I’m guessing it wasn’t intended as a way to motivate hesitant morning exercisers, it almost always works for me, and it feels like freedom.
This isn’t the same kind of freedom I had in my twenties, but it’s a richer one, forged by love, loss, endurance, and a deeper knowing of what it costs to make space for yourself. These days, time doesn’t stretch out like an endless road; it appears in small pockets, tucked between drop-offs and deadlines. But I’ll take it. I’ll guard it. I’ll lift, I’ll breathe, I’ll whisper my little morning prayer and mean it.
And then I gratefully do the next right thing, one rep, one breath, one reclaimed moment at a time. I’m not chasing a new version of myself. I’m trying to take care of the one who’s already here.
Photo Credit Peyman Shojaei