Fete Lifestyle Magazine April 2021 - Spring/Fashion Issue | Page 67

until you first accept who you are??? It took me years to figure that out. My epiphany came through meditation. This was the first time I knew that I was not my body. I was the spirit encased by a body, kind of like a fun costume to wear while on earth. Once I realize that, I felt so much freedom. It didn’t matter what I chose, because I could never change what I was on the inside and that was important for me to understand.

I’m not against plastic surgery, however I believe it’s important to understand why you are making the decision. In my experience it is better to make decisions from a place of empowerment rather than self-loathing. When you align from the inside out, you are working from a place of authenticity and that is powerful.

But let’s go back to where we began, why do those comments affect us so much? After pondering this question for many years, I could only come up with this…our society says that in order for women to be seen we need to be beautiful, so therefore we equate our self-worth with how we look. This idea that we are only as valuable as the way we look starts early.

Little girls are complimented for being beautiful, pretty, and dainty. Look at those eyes, her hair is gorgeous, that skin is flawless, and so on. Have we all forgotten that we have absolutely NO control over our genetic make-up? Why would we compliment someone for something they had nothing to do with? It was simply the luck of the draw. This behavior perpetuates itself in our later

years. Watch the next time you see two women greet each other. Nine times out of ten, you will hear a compliment about the way they look. What if we started complementing women for the things that are tangible? What if we complimented her work ethic, creativity, how smart she is, or how kind she is. I wonder if this subtle change would be profound. Maybe then those comments about our appearance wouldn’t penetrate so deep because we would know that we are more than our exterior costume.

My experiences along with the countless experiences shared with me by other women led me to write the screenplay, AWAKEN HER. AWAKEN HER is a female driven, surreal, psychological thriller set in the plastic surgery world. It is about a woman who is psychologically damaged at an early age and hides her pain behind plastic surgery, as an internal battle rages she loses her grip on reality and heads down a dangerous path of revenge to right the wrongs from her past. If you are interested in learning more about the film, AWAKEN HER, and how you can help bring this important narrative to life, please visit www.wefunder.com/awakenher.

Shame and Body Dysmorphic Disorder are closely related. If you struggle with BDD there are people that can help. You are not alone. For more information about Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) call the OWH (office of women’s health) Helpline at 1-800-994-9662.

Photo Credit Drew Graham

Photo Credit Anthony Tran

Photo Credit Gemma Chua Tran