Femme Plus July 2017 | Page 27

in our relationship. When I confronted him about what I found, it marked our worst fight yet. Tyler was in an angry rage at being caught out and I found myself hiding under the covers of our bed, willing myself to sink into the mat- tress and disappear completely. As I was hiding, I heard him come beside the bed and felt his fist meet my thigh. As soon as he left the room, I took my phone and locked myself in the bathroom, covering my mouth with my hands, trying to quite my sobs. Minutes past be- fore I heard Tyler came to the bath- room door, violent- ly shaking the door- knob before banging on the door trying to get in. I kept hidden, holding my phone in my hand desperately wanting to call for help. I thought to call my family, my old best friend, even the police - but I didn’t. Looking back now, I wished I had of called someone - anyone. A fter that fight I had shut off emotionally and had almost accepted that I would be trapped in this endless cycle of abuse. The days after these fights – a house of silence, cold and empty glances, stretched on for what felt like weeks. I fell into a deeper de- pression and became suicidal. I wanted nothing more than to be free from the relationship and my circumstance, yet I thought of my fam- ily and how distraught they would be. My family and the hope that maybe one- day things would be better gave me more reason to stay. W ithin only months of that argument, Tyler, to my surprise, broke up with me. Part of me felt anger towards him for leaving me when I had wanted to leave many times but couldn’t. However, that anger quickly left me when during our last discussion he threw things at me, leaving a bruise upon my thigh and slamming the door in rage as he left. When he was gone I felt a mixture of sadness, shock and relief. Months after the break- up he explained to me that he broke up with me to “set me free from my t