OP-ED
Of Love, Lack of Sleep
& Motherhood
By Euforica Lim Cai Rong
Back in October, one of
our guest columnists,
Desmond Foo, recounted
the pitfalls of being in
China while traversing
their family’s first
pregnancy. This month,
his wife, who recently
gave birth two months
back, discovers the
joys (and horrors) of
motherhood.
Having a baby is something I have always been looking
forward to. In fact, every bit of my pregnancy was
inundated with the joys of the impending delivery. Having
pored through tons of baby books, magazines and online
forums and with multiple seminars and antenatal class
under my belt since my baby started its journey as an
embryo, I was ready to be a proud mum, almost as proud
as if I was going to be awarded a PhD in motherhood.
However, that confidence was soon quashed as reality
knocked some sense into me - my perceived “PhD” was in
fact a PSLE certificate in disguise.
My expectation of a well-planned day with routine
feedings, diaper changing and showering was as real
as a castle built in the air. Instead, the first few days
after being discharged from hospital were governed
by my little one’s whim and fancy. Almost everything I
learnt from books and seminars was ejected from my
memory the moment he started wailing. Sometimes the
wailing reduced me to tears. Whenever that happens, my
significant other had to soothe not one, but two crying
babies, and he always managed it without much difficulty.
Motherhood (or rather parenthood) is life-changing in
several aspects, none of which would be imaginable
before personally setting foot into this phase, but all of
which I willingly accept as the responsibilities of a doting
mum.
SLEEP The very first thing to be sacrificed upon
assuming the role of a parent is sleep. Many
others who have trod this path warned me
about the meagre sleep we could afford.
Indeed, succumbing to fatigue at those
hours that I have been so used to,
became a luxury. Our sleep is now
rationed at intervals determined by
my little one’s feeding and nap time. After accounting for
the time to address our daily needs, there is only so much
left. You know sleep is lacking when you make a fruitless
attempt to seal the milk bottle with the wrong cap, or
mistake the little one’s head for the giant switch button on
his favourite musical seahorse. Even normal physiological
reflexes are delayed by seconds.
Fortunately, with dogged determination, it did not take too
long to learn to predict the feeding time with accuracy and
differentiate one cry from another (whether it is hunger,
wet diaper, pain or simply the need to be carried and
pampered). Mastering these granted my husband and me
with golden opportunities to take power naps.
MEALS Since the onset of pregnancy, I surrendered the
privilege of choosing what I loved to eat, and went for
what I needed to eat instead, only indulging myself when
my taste buds threatened to revolt against the healthy
diet. This self-imposed healthy diet got stricter when I
started breastfeeding, knowing that what I eat is what he
gets. Earlier, I would have baulked at the mere thought of
ingesting any animal innards (like kidney or liver) or green
leafy vegetables bigger than a toddler’s palm. Now, I wolf
them down like delicacies. I am fortunate that my motherin-law is a good cook, making it easier than I expected.
Milk supply is another factor that determines what I eat,
thus Fenugreek tea and oat milk, which are said to help
boost milk supply, have become fast friends. I go to the
extent of volunteering to test milk supply boosting cookies
for a friend selling them (and to her credit, I must say
those cookies taste great).
SHOPPING TRIPS An indication of being sworn into
the circl