FOCUS
Medical
P wer Couple
The
We hear of power
couples all the time;
Hollywood’s Brangelina,
the all-powerful Barack
and Michelle Obama,
our very own Fann Wong
and Christopher Lee.
Now, meet the medical
power couple
of Singapore.
By Neu Weetee
What does being a successful couple
truly mean? Not just successful in
the practical sense – being wealthy,
holding fulfilling jobs or living in an
expensive house – but in all other less
tangible aspects like balancing work
and personal life, keeping the flame
of romance alive, raising children
effectively, and most importantly,
staying happy.
We have a healthy mutual respect
for each other. However, I’m still a
bit traditional and would rather go
for someone whom I could trust and
respect to lead the house.”
Power couple Dr Karen Soh, newly
appointed President of the Association
of Women Doctors and aesthetics
specialist, and Dr Siow Hua Ming,
a medical director who majors in
sports and orthopaedics, is the perfect
example of such a successful couple.
Interestingly, Karen and Siow initially
only wanted three kids. However, Karen
somehow got pregnant in spite of the
presence of an intrauterine device
within her. Seeing it as God’s grace, they
worked hard to make sure that they
could support four children, financially,
socially and academically, especially
in a competitive environment like
Singapore.
TWO BECOME ONE
Young people in this era seldom
settle down with their first serious
sweetheart but not so long ago, that
was the case for Dr Soh and Dr Siow.
They got engaged soon after meeting,
barely a year into dating.
If you want
your children to
be independent
and fully
functioning,
you by the
same extension
cannot be
beholden
to them in the
sense that you
exist because
of your children.
10
Family & Life • Aug 2014
Dr Siow explains with a laugh that the
relationship progressed swiftly after the
both of them realised how compatible
they were; they shared similar interests
and beliefs. Dr Siow was attracted to
Karen’s grounded character. As for
Karen, she was looking for a man with
strong values to lead the household and
the serious Dr Siow ticked all the boxes
on her checklist.
Four children and more than a decade
of marriage later, Karen still gushes
about her husband.
STARTING A FAMILY
Karen worked around her demanding
schedule, squeezing all her patients
into a small window so that her children
were not neglected. Karen proudly
summarises her parenting, which sees
her packing lunch boxes, checking
homework and setting schedules
with the family drivers despite her
demanding work hours. “I’m a full-time
doctor and a full-time mother.”
“As a woman, I think it’s important to
marry up in terms of these characters.
He is supposed to be the head of the
household and if I’m the best person in
the house, that’s not good!” says Dr Soh.
The duo has strong views about
Singapore’s education system and its
leanings towards parentocracy, whereby
a child’s education is influenced more
by the parents’ wealth and social status
rather that the child’s ability. “It’s not a
good thing. A bright kid who is not given
the support that we give to our children
will find it hard to beat an average kid with
the right support system,” Karen says.
“Don’t mistake it for a dominantsubmissive kind of relationship though.
That’s why Siow sincerely believes in the
concept of stay-home mothers. He says
that this very traditional concept has
benefits in terms of the discipline and
learning of the child, because there’s
always someone there. He reminisces
that full-time mothers were a common
thing in the past but due to the rising
cost of living in Singapore, it is quickly
becoming much harder to be one.
Even so, he realises that families who
have made the conscious decision to
survive on a single breadwinner with
one full-time housekeeper are the
ones with the most optimum studying
environment. In fact, he finds that the
children in these families do better than
those with tuition!
ON SINGAPORE’S
EDUCATION SYSTEM
On the subject of the system, Siow
reckons that Singaporean children
today are far too stressed. “I find that
when I was growing up, I had enough
time in primary school to enjoy myself,
to be a kid. PSLE wasn’t a make-orbreak exam. The rest of my generation
was like that as well,” he says. He
adds that while Singapore education
system seems to have been improved
with more and more components
over the years, students definitely
experience more stress nowadays.
Dr Siow admits that he applies more
pressure on his children than what
his mother used to give him, and he
explains that this is because of the
compulsory CCAs, piling project work
and the generally tough curriculum.
Karen feels sensibly that school
hours should be changed because she
understands the genetics and wiring
of many children who tend to be more
active at night. To her, starting an
hour or two later than the normal