Family and Faith Magazine August-September 2015 | Page 25

RELATIONSHIPS appropriate interaction with single ladies also protects them (single ladies) too, from confusion and pain. Why? Because single women have their unique desires as women as well. A married man can oftentimes become the deep desire of a single lady because somehow she has ‘committed’ herself to him because of something he has made her feel. However prudent married men know how to interact with single ladies. They know how to facilitate mutually beneficial relationships that won’t end in brokenness and pain. For example a wise married man will always allow for some distance between himself and any single lady friend - There is a "too close for comfort". A good check-and-balance mechanism for 'correct distance' is using your wife's measurement lines. Let her help you to determine what ‘the lines’ are. Do you remember that rule we use to use with multiple choice exams, "When in doubt, choose 'C ". Well we can use that again - 'C' in this case means 'Check'! Choose to Check your wife! Go Check what she thinks. For the appropriate dos and don’ts, where single ladies are concerned “C” your wife. And if we are afraid to, it probably means we've gone past the appropriate line, and are in the 'inappropriate place'. Yes, when our conscience isn't strong enough to reel us in, we need our wives to show us the truth. Well-known Evangelist Billy Graham was one of the most successful men in ministry and possibly in marriage too. Not because of a unique gift, I think, but from the good use of common sense and good discipline. It is said that he meticulously planned how to stay in the 'appropriate place' with women: He would not give single ladies a ride in his car if he was alone. He planned how to stay pure and proper. And he kept to his position even if it made others uncomfortable. And that's what all of us men have to do. I remember my wife saying to me, "That lady has a plan - Watch out for her". Of course I was not concerned at the time about any 'scheme' of the lady. I figured my wife was being too sensitive, etc. But lo and behold, she was right. The lady had had a plan to try to eventually seduce me. In fact she had told another friend that, that was her plan, and he eventually told me! How should married men interact with single ladies? By having the right perspective and being disciplined and truthful; by being cognisant that we must protect our wives, the single ladies and ourselves and by being mindful of 1 Corinthians 10:12 “Wherefore let him that thinketh he standeth take heed lest he fall.” Chris Brodber is an Author and Pastor. Send comments to [email protected] Make your Wedding Magical with Mellow Groove Music We provide saxophonists, pianists, guitarists, vocalists and many other instrumentalists for your weddings, dinners, private parties, graduations, corporate events and other special occasions. We also offer recorded music, DJs, public address (PA) system and entertainment consultancy services. Email or call us today! email: [email protected] | Ph: [phone] familyandfaithmagazine.com 25