Connection Is Crucial
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Prentis Brooks
Prentis Brooks and his wife, Christie, have been living with Parkinson’ s since 2013.
Many care partners struggle silently and don’ t reach out for help. Discussions around mental health wellness and even preparing for the eventual death of the partner— both financially and emotionally— are essential to easing that burden. I’ ve been caring for my wife, Christie, since her Parkinson’ s diagnosis in 2013.
We’ ve been married for 38 years. We were supposed to take a trip to France and Italy for our 35th wedding anniversary, but we moved it up. On the trip, we met another couple, and I recognized that the husband showed signs of Parkinson’ s. I mentioned that to Christie, and she spoke to him about it. It turns out that he had been diagnosed just 30 days earlier and was struggling emotionally. Her conversation with him really gave him some direction and support, and we’ ve stayed in touch ever since.
That connection is crucial, not only for people with Parkinson’ s, but also for care partners. The isolation of the disease for the care partner— especially in the later stages— is something I didn’ t expect. After COVID-19, we discovered how limited home health care resources really are. Many professionals left the field after the pandemic due to burnout, and those remaining may not be trained in specific Parkinson’ s care, which is very different from general aging or dementia care.
I’ ve built a support team of former coworkers, friends and family members, many who have been care partners themselves. We talk regularly. That support has been critical for me. I’ ve always been the quieter, more introverted one in our relationship. But after Christie’ s second diagnosis— multiple system atrophy in 2024— I’ ve had to help her with nearly everything. She told me she never wanted me to take care of her, that it was supposed to be the other way around. I’ ve had to become her advocate and speak up in ways that go against my natural personality. It’ s exhausting, but necessary.
For me, being a care partner is an extension of the wedding vows that Christie and I took over 38 years ago:“ In sickness and in health.” You may not understand it at the time you say it, but this is what it means. Taking care of someone in their final years is one of the most loving things you can do.