Four resilience myths : Debunked by Karen for EAs everywhere
EDITORIAL
Everyone wants to stay physically and psychologically healthy and capable of pursuing what ’ s important to them , even when things get hard . Claire Muir talks with resilience expert and keynote speaker Karen McCarthy about what you can prioritise to improve your chances of doing just that
Did you know that , although many companies offer resilience training , you don ’ t necessarily need time away from your regular duties to enhance your capacity to deal with change and adversity ? Karen McCarthy says that what ’ s needed is to leverage the determination that got you to where you are now : “ It won ’ t take long for you to get strong but it will take persistence ,” she advises .
“ In her 2016 book , Grit : The Power of Passion and Perseverance , Angela Duckworth says that talent ( our natural abilities , which include the genetic contributors to resilience ) counts once while effort counts twice . What you need to put effort into is getting centered , spacious , strong , smart and supported .”
And so it began … A barrister , Karen was in her fifteenth year of legal practice in 2016 when , in the course of surgery to remove a tumour from her pituitary , she suffered a traumatic brain injury and became critically ill . As doctors fought heroically to keep her alive , they warned her husband she would probably die or that , if she did survive , she would be severely disabled . They also said that the vision loss Karen was experiencing might resolve with time . But they were wrong on all counts .
What followed was weeks in intensive care , a ward placement and a transfer to the Brain Injury Rehabilitation Unit at Brisbane ’ s Princess Alexandra Hospital . Karen never did recover her sight but surprised everyone when , two months later ( exactly six months after sustaining the initial injury ) she was well enough to be discharged home using a wheelchair .
Four resilience myths : Debunked by Karen for EAs everywhere
I ’ m just not that resilient “ While there are genetic factors and childhood experiences that can set you up with more tools in your resilience toolkit , anyone can take steps to improve their capacity to maintain wellbeing through hard times , including people who are already coping with a mental health diagnosis . Even small steps can take you on a big journey .”
If I ’ m more resilient , my boss will load me up with more stress “ People with lower levels of resilience are likely to be responding to the demands of their work with less regard for their wellbeing , meaning they experience more symptoms of stress than their more resilient counterparts . The more stressed you are , the less able you are to draw clear boundaries and communicate your limits effectively to others . When you increase your resilience , however , not only will your limits increase , you will also have the wherewithal to communicate what you ’ re experiencing and seek support before you approach a dysregulated emotional state .”
The organisation should focus on the causes of my stress rather than my capacity to deal with it “ If all the potential causes of stress were within the control of your organisation , this might be a valid argument . But they ’ re not . Pandemics , poor economic outlooks , tech-driven change and a whole host of other challenges are outside the control of anyone and we each need to be ready to cope if tomorrow is , in fact , the worst day of our lives . Besides , it ’ s not a case of individuals proactively building their resilience or the organisation tackling the causes of employee stress . Both can , and should , happen simultaneously .”
I don ’ t have time “ Top-level assistants are busy people who are relied on to be at their best whenever their boss or bosses need them . So , it is a wise investment of your time to preserve and enhance your resilience . It will help you avoid the absence and under-performance that are likely to result when you are overwhelmed and on the edge of burn-out .”
Conquering every obstacle “ The first time I was discharged for the weekend to visit home was my daughter Mary ’ s 8th birthday ,” says Karen . “ Mark hadn ’ t told her and her sister , Ruby , I would be there so when I arrived with the other guests , they were beside themselves . Ruby described to me all the gifts Mary was given as she opened them . It still chokes me up when I think about what my little girls went through that year and how very brave they were for each other .” j
Winter Issue 2023 | Executive PA 19