Excelsior 2013
Roommate Agreement
The newcomer to the room has to abide by certain rules
and treat them as the fundamental rights of the existing occupant of the
room. The clauses of the roommate agreement are as follows
The aforesaid
ŸShall have complete right over the toilet between 7.30-8.30 in the morning.
ŸIs entitled to exploit the LAN to his heart's desire and shall not be asked to
compromise with his surfing time at any cost.
ŸIs alert and highly sensitive to any kind of sound even while sleeping (unlike
other lesser mortals) as a consequence of which the newcomer is forbidden from
snoring.
ŸFeels stressed in excess light and depressed in low light and has thereby complete
authority to decide the number of lights operating and when.
ŸHas strategically positioned his bed so that least effort and time is expended in
reaching for his belongings. Any tampering with this arrangement even in inches
is liable to incur penalties.
ŸIs highly organized. Meddling with his stuff isn't tolerable.
ŸIs a cleanliness freak (which in itself is an understatement). Any slackness
shown by the newcomer in his turn for cleaning the room or failing to
organize his cupboard every night before going to sleep shall have grave
consequences.
ŸValues time more than money. Hence the newcomer is not allowed to
indulge in any frivolous or distracting acts like discussions about female
classmates, planning weekends or making instant noodles.
ŸIs allergic to even the slightest number of pathogens. Consequently the
roommate shall have a bath twice a day in all seasons.
ŸHas absolute authority to alter, rephrase or shamelessly break any
of the above stated rules. The newcomer is denied the right to question
or protest in any way..................................................................................
Fun 21