What signs do you look for to tell the difference between a horse that is deliberately avoiding what you are asking and a horse that simply doesn’t understand?
This is a great question and I’m going to examine it by looking at two characteristics of horses - if you can work out which one your horse has, you may be able to work out what they are doing.
The two characteristics: I have come across horses which at times are very good at not paying a lot of attention to me ("evaders") and other horses which at times are very attentive towards me and what I am doing (“aware horses”). One horse can have both tendencies in different situations.
Evaders: Horses that are very good at mentally blocking out a rider have quite a strong focus to be elsewhere, perhaps in the paddock or with their mates. These are the types of horses that can be very good at avoiding you and in some ways they can seem very quiet and bomb proof; sometimes in conjunction with a confidant and pushy nature. I think that they are able to “zone out” from us because there has been no need to be acutely aware of us and our ideas. I don't see this "evasion" as malicious; more that their thoughts are just elsewhere.
Aware horses: I have found that some horses which are more alert or horses which come to me that have had little prior contact with people, are far more aware of me. This is the reason that I prefer horses which have had little handling to start rather than ones which have been over-humanized (horses which only consider people as providers of food, shelter and scratches). These nervous, unsure, but attentive horses are more responsive to people and training purely because their attention is on you. However, there are times during training where they might feel trapped or perhaps can’t cope with not understanding and they try to find another way out. These attempts to escape can also lead to “zoning out”.
Is your horse with you?
When your horse is “zoning out”, it is not with you. This is one thing that we have to be very aware of when we are working horses, whether we are working on the ground or riding. We have to look for signs to indicate whether our horse is with us or not. By this I mean is the mental focus of your horse with you? So before you even go into any sort of lesson –whether it be on the ground or ridden with your horse – assess your horse and work on gaining their calm, attentive focus. I sometimes see people gaining focus in quite abrupt way, but