34 The good helper
TO THE TRAINER
PART II: THE TRAINING
The good helper
Aims. To help both the trainer and the group to understand, in their own terms, what it means to be a‘ helper’, and what kinds of‘ help’ may be included. Also, to identify their own resources, and what additional skills and resources they might need.
EXERCISE
Exercise 3. Describe the qualities of a good helper.
Draw the helper on the flip chart( Figure 1: The qualities of a good helper in your society and context). Leave space to write comments.
• What are the differences between male and female helpers?
• Use the list of questions on the facing page to explore the issues.
• Write participants’ comments and conclusions on the flipchart.
ROLE PLAY EXERCISE
Role Play 1. The first meeting between a Helper and a Survivor.
Show the participants how to role play by demonstrating how you might approach a survivor who is overwhelmed by her emotions. Ask another trainer or a participant to put on a scarf to play the role of Survivor. Then invite the participants to practise together in pairs with scarves, using the questions. Show them how to physically brush off their roles and return to being themselves when the role play ends. Make sure they all do this at the end of the exercise. An example of role play can be found in Section 9 of Part III.
Summing up the experiences so far
To end the session, summarise the major issues that have been touched on. Validate good things participants are already doing. Pay special attention to helping strategies that take account of culture.
Make sure the participants take away some positive feedback about their experience and their strengths. It is vital to begin the training by affirming their own knowledge. The training exists to complement and enrich the gifts and experience that helpers already have.
This exercise and the role play together should
• Help the group to understand more fully what makes a good helper.
• Throw light on: her personal and professional skills; her character; her ethics; how she relates to others; how she manages problems that she confronts in her daily work.
• Show practically how helpers assist in real life, how they calibrate distance and closeness, how they listen …
• Help the group to understand how a human rights-based approach can assist them in their work.
The introductory session should have given the group an opportunity to reflect on what goes on at the beginning of a helping relationship.
TEACHING INSTRUCTION.
After the exercise, take a short break. Let the participants stretch their bodies and walk around a little. Before you start the next session, spend some time doing a grounding and breathing exercise, to get the group back on track.