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Preparing to return to the community
SAID ALOUD
Preparing to return to the community
Aim. To clarify the many challenges that may arise for a survivor when she returns to her community, and what kinds of assistance can make her return easier or more successful.
PART II: THE TRAINING
Trainer. I will continue.
Slowly the Butterfly Woman regained her strength. She acquired confidence in the skills she had learned, and was not so worried about being triggered. She managed to ground herself quite quickly when it happened.
Still, one area in her life overwhelmed her with sadness and despair. She tried not to think about it because it gave her so much pain. One day the helper brought it up without her asking. The helper said that it was time to try to talk to her husband and family, to see if it might be possible to reconnect with them.
When the Butterfly Woman heard the helper, she immediately saw an image of her husband with angry and frightened eyes, his mouth open, yelling that she should leave. She saw her crying children, and it tore her heart. She started to tremble and cry but managed to ground herself and come back to the present.
She and the helper continued to talk about a possible reunion. The helper calmed her by saying that they would proceed step by step. Some of the helpers visited the village to talk to her family and other villagers. The Butterfly Woman derived great support from another woman from her village, who had also been raped and rejected by her family. They supported each other and reminded each other to use the coping skills they had learned. They were encouraged to talk about good memories of the village, so the bad memories would lose some of their strong grip on their bodies and minds.
Discussion. Explore the challenges involved.
DISCUSSION
Ask the participants to form small groups and discuss the challenges that confront a survivor when she decides she would like to return to her community. Discuss also how it could have been different if a human rights-based approach had been adopted in the community.