Elucid Magazine Elucid Magazine 2013 | Page 54

REACH EVERY GOAL WITH BODY LANGUAGE FLUENCY S ince childhood, you’ve been learning how to become self-aware of your actions and to adjust them according to your surroundings (and according to what you wanted), but sometimes, these behaviors become so deeply imbedded in our subconscious that we’re unaware of the impressions we make when we fail to adjust according to circumstances. To further develop this idea of self-awareness beginning in childhood, you were rewarded when you sat and ate all of your peas at the family dinner table. You were also rewarded when you acted like a wild ape on the jungle gym down the block. Approval came from two difference audiences, in two very different situations, but you learned through these experiences that different behaviors netted different, but equally wonderful rewards. In my one-on-one work with clients, I am never surprised to hear a man or woman say, “Is that really how I come across?” This simple question/response is the beginning of the solving of a number of problems. A significant number of people have little or no selfawareness about how they’re being perceived by others – or how they should adjust their behavior according to their audience, surroundings, and desired rewards. For instance, a man may be very good at netting females in a club situation, but has yet to experience any real succ ess in a professional situation. Here are some examples of how he might act during happy hour: >>> Body Posture/Position: Legs spread, hands clasped behind the head, chin up. >>> Movement: Invasion of personal space, touching. >>> Verbals: Critical remarks, comments based on appearance. 54 ELUCID MAGAZINE SUMMER 2013