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26/7/05
7:50 pm
Page 86
Drum: WOMAN 2 MAN
Dance With My Father
The rise of the fragmented family means that more and more men
are growing old without knowing their children. Amina Taylor
shares her journey of forgiveness.
I
t is a painful moment watching the man who
meant the most to you in the entire world shrink
before your eyes. I had known about my father’s
battle with his drug demons for years but as a young
woman on the verge of forced womanhood, my
father’s drug problem was something that hovered in
the background and clouded all our lives but it was
never openly discussed. Children whispered; their
parents stared and pointed at the school gates but I
held my head high.
That was until the night my own father took back a
birthday present he’d given me when I turned 13. My
mother used to joke the thin gold chain was glued to
my neck and would probably turn green but I didn’t
care. My dad had given that to me and since he didn’t
live at home anymore, his present was that much
sweeter. When he literally ripped it from my neck
promising to get me an even better one I realised
just how far my father had fallen. A once proud man