FINALLY FREE – RUTH’S STORY
I
n July last year, I walked
out of my London flat with
just a cushion, some cards
and a cardholder – nothing
else. I was in a bad way and
wasn’t really sure where I was
going. I ended up in Margate with
nowhere to stay except a relative’s
holiday cottage. I was at rock
bottom and knew I needed help
for my drinking, which was out of
control.
It hadn’t always been like this.
I’d had a great career in media
for over 20 years, but alcohol
had become part of it – taking a
client out for drinks or letting off
steam with friends after a hard
day. Without realising I ended
up reliant on alcohol – at first in
social situations, then a physical
dependency.
Things finally came to a
head this year – I was going
through a particularly tough
time in my personal life and my
drinking escalated. At my worst,
I was drinking about a litre of
vodka a day. I tried to stop on
my own which resulted in me
being admitted to A&E with
hallucinations. The doctor told me
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I needed to drink, which shocked
me – I didn’t understand how
dangerous it is to suddenly stop
when you’re physically dependent.
So I went back to drinking (as
instructed!) but without proper
guidance and support I ended
up drinking the same amount as
before.
Fast forward to my journey to
Margate. I’m still not quite sure
how I managed to find the Hub – I
didn’t know the area that well and
I was quite out of it. But I’m so
glad I did. I was assessed that day
and assigned a key worker, who
has been absolutely brilliant. They
enrolled me in their new alcohol
pathway initiative, which involved
several stages. The first was an
intensive, group-based ‘pre-detox’
week, where we met on a daily
basis to prepare ourselves for
the realities – both physical and
emotional – of stopping drinking.
The group was great – there’s
something about that kind
of environment that really
encourages you to open up and be
vulnerable. You get the feeling that
whatever surface-level differences
you might have – age, gender,
social status or whatever – deep
down you’re all in the same boat
and understand what challenges
the others are going through.
The next week I did a medically
assisted detox lasting five days.
I had to come to the Hub every
morning, be breathalysed to
make sure I wasn’t drinking and
collect my daily medication. I also
had some medical tests to check
things like liver function.
I had to move back to London
not long after I completed the
detox, but I know that the Hub is
running an abstinence group to
support the people who still live
locally. Importantly, they’ve given
me the tools to stay strong in my
recovery, particularly making sure I
link into the fellowship (Alcoholics
Anonymous) in London, whose
meetings I attend on a regular
basis. They also taught me about
the importance of a strong
support network, being honest
– even if it means admitting a slip-
up – and being compassionate to
others and yourself.
I’ve been sober ever since. It’s
not always plain sailing but I’m in
such a better place. I have a new
‘Before I stopped
drinking, I was
worried that
being abstinent
would take away
my freedom. It’s
actually been the
other way around.’
full-time job in retail and I’ve never
taken a day off sick. My friends
have been amazing, as has my
new boss, who knows all about my
recovery and is really supportive. I
recently got promoted and to top
it off I’ve started running a vintage
pop-up in my spare time. Oh and
I’ve lost two stone!
Before I stopped drinking, I
was worried that being abstinent
would take away my freedom.
It’s actually been the other way
around. My life revolved around
alcohol and everything needed to
fit in around my drinking. Now I
don’t need to find ways to squeeze
alcohol in – I’m free from it, and it
feels great.
NOVEMBER 2019 • DRINK AND DRUGS NEWS • 9
PATH