Definition for Ladies Spring 2014 Issue 001 April 2014 | Page 72
Dear Erin,
These hips are narrow, but it’s not in the plan for us
to bear children with them anyway. We are just fine for
carrying a dog resting on us, bumping the car door closed
and squeezing through crowds or tight spaces.
These thighs have always been gigantic, but we were
perfect for an adolescence of dance, gymnastics, softball
and basketball; a 20:36 PR for a 5K, a 1:42 half marathon,
bike rides up to 80 miles and steep trails explored;
countless stairs climbed, ropes and boxes jumped and
weights pressed. When paired with our equally proportioned
calves, we have caused many boyfriends to drool and walk
a couple steps behind to gaze in awe and jealousy. We make
sure stretch jeans will stay in demand and look like some
kind of badass Quadzilla in them.
These breasts will never be larger than a B cup, and we
may only fill an A during competition seasons. We love
being free and braless at home, not painfully bouncing
everywhere during exercise, and maintaining our perkiness.
It’s a fair trade. We know there is a pair of gel pads
sitting in the bra drawer, and we don’t mind being boosted
with them if the situation calls for it.
These feet may fit in a 9.5 running shoe, which seems
freakishly large on a 5’4” frame, but we would walk to the
ends of the earth for a loved one if asked. We also hope
to walk alongside that adorable furry dog three times a
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spring | 2014 | definitionforladies.com