Jottings from previous page
the Knight ’ s car - KN19 TER . – and the fine was issued .
The demand was waived and the ( not very ) smart camera was given a good talking to following its shoddy performance .
Canine Corner
Christmas came a little early for dogs during the last month or so , First , a phone , then a TV channel .
The DogPhone is a device in the form of a ball which detects motion . When the dog picks up the ball , the motion trigger initiates a video call on a laptop computer , allowing pet owners to see and interact with their dogs while out of the house .
The DogPhone ’ s inventors say that , in time , the dog will learn that picking up the ball will cause the video call , and will associate it with their owner appearing on the computer screen . They add that it will be beneficial for those dogs which suffer from stress when left home alone .
The prototype DogPhone has been developed by scientists at universities in Scotland and Finland who claim it will be the first smart toy for pets which considers what the animal wants . The owner can also call the dog , of course , but the dog is free to ignore the call if it wants .
When it finally goes on sale , expect your pet to use the DogPhone to ask you to switch on DOGTV which launched in the UK and Europe last month .
The new subscription channel says it has been developed , “ following studies into animals ’ physiological and psychological needs , moods and responses , to help them feel more stimulated or relaxed when needed .”
DOGTV says it offers soothing content , presented in colours and sounds that are most palatable to dogs ’ perceptions , with “ healing sound frequencies and positive affirmations ” which should stimulate them , calm them , and even educate them , by slowly getting them used to new or triggering sounds . Programmes include The Dog Chef , Road Dogs , Things We Woof About , The Adoption Show , and Meet The Breed .
Your Jottings team , led by Rosie the rescue dog , have not road-tested DOGTV yet , but us humans just hope there ’ s a paws button ... ( groan ! Ed )
Finally , good news for George , a wirehaired pointer whose human , Richard Bunce , is the station master at East Horsley in Surrey . The UK ’ s South Western Railway issued a directive that Richard could no longer take George to work with him after it received one complaint ( that ’ s one as in “ fewer than two ”) from an anonymous commuter .
Richard was about to quit his job as a result because he could not afford a dog-sitter to look after George , but now we hear that there may be a reprieve after an intervention by Transport Secretary Grant Shapps . After almost 4,000 local people signed a petition in support of George , Mr Shapps contacted South Western Railway who said they would review the situation in discussion with Richard .
As Soltalk went to Press , a final decision was awaited , but it ’ s looking good for George .
What ’ s in a **** ing name ?
A Hong Kong gin producer has been forced to rename its product after the UK ’ s alcohol industry Independent Complaints Panel deemed the label was offensive . Or to be more accurate , the name of the gin was unacceptable by people who find swearing undesirable .
The producer , Icognito Group Ltd , claim that the name was chosen to pay tribute to a street in Hong Kong called Fuk Hing Lane , but that to save causing offence , they had changed the first word to Fok . “ We strive ,” they said , “ to be a brand that celebrates the language , culture and heritage of Hong Kong .”
They add that locals have long since stopped sniggering at the street name , although visitors still see the funny side , “ so why not let them in on the joke ?”
Unfortunately , a complaint from a member of the public who is a licensing officer prompted a review by the Panel . Its finding was the first time that a complaint against a drink ’ s name has been upheld in relation to causing serious or widespread offence . The name was , they concluded , “ clearly intended to shock and be pronounced as an offensive term .” Oh , bother it ...
Dull lives
Kevin Beresford has lived up to his nickname of “ Britain ’ s Dullest Man ” after publishing his 2022 calendar . Now 69 , Kevin ’ s rise to fame began in 2003 when his first calendar , which featured 12 pictures of traffic roundabouts in Redditch , sold an estimated 100,000 copies worldwide .
Since then , sequels have been printed leading up to the 2022 calendar , “ Benches of Redditch ,” which includes 12 photographs of public seating areas around the town . Typical of these is March Bench , described as , “ Somewhat sad looking wooden bench standing guard outside a defunct chip shop . Either side are wooden flower bins . One is empty , the other boasts a few weeds .”
Kevin , a founder member of the UK Roundabout Appreciation Society . a member of the Dull Men ’ s Club and winner of Anorak of the Year in 2018 , looks like he has another best seller . It is thought “ Benches of Redditch ” may outsell a current children ’ s book , “ The Bench ,” written by a Ms M . Markle .
Adventurous Advent
The Advent calendar , which counts down the days of Advent ahead of Christmas , made its first appearance in Germany in the 19th century . The calendar has since become a marketing tool , offering 24 small gifts , one to be opened each day , as December 25 approaches .
These gifts have varied from the simple token to the eye-wateringly expensive , but , as far as we know , no Advent calendar has ever given away sardines ... until now . Charles Vestal , from Berlin , Germany , has produced a one-off calendar which includes 24 cans of sardines which he picked up during a holiday in Portugal .
Explaining his decision , Charles said he isn ’ t obsessed with sardines , but with all sorts of weird things in the commercial Advent calendars , he thought why not sardines ? He taped some cardboard boxes together and added some colourful designs , in the hope that fans will enjoy the fun and perhaps make their own . ( Didn ’ t Valerie Singleton do this in 1965 ?)
Meanwhile , Advent calendars have
Continued overleaf
24