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‘ For a lot of people here it’ s genuinely life-changing... It’ s about connection and meeting people from across the UK, feeling part of a national community.’
SCOTT WILLIAMS
remaining 9mg in his pocket, he said.‘ I was feeling a bit anxious. But then I floated through the rest of that shift.’
His using was‘ opportunistic and insidious,’ he told delegates, and ever-increasing.‘ In labour, women get 100mg of pethidine. I used seven times that in a 24-hour period.’ Addiction was like‘ being on an elevator that’ s constantly going down – you can get off at any point, but most of us don’ t get off until we hit rock bottom’.
FEAR AND PARANOIA He was in denial and‘ didn’ t even notice’ he was lying, he said.‘ I was
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quite arrogant and proud – I’ m a doctor, of course. I would be paranoid and fearful about getting caught, and using would give me a temporary relief. At the end I had shame, guilt, remorse and selfhate.’ He felt powerless, hopeless and suicidal, he told delegates.
When he finally decided to seek help, one of the conditions imposed on him was that he’ d need to self-refer to the regulator, the General Medical Council( GMC).‘ I had to prove myself. But there was this compulsion to use, and this obsession that I could use“ normally”.’ He attended treatment in Scotland, which saved his life and career, he told the conference.‘ Going into rehab is very difficult for a doctor – you have to become the patient.’ The worst – and best – things about stopping using drugs were that‘ your feelings and emotions come back’, he added.
‘ My addiction was bigger than me, and I had to find something bigger than that to beat it. And that was fellowship, people, networking,’ he said.‘ Recovery is fun – I didn’ t get into recovery to be miserable. It’ s a journey of perseverance out of isolation. Find your tribe. I’ m a grateful survivor rather than a resentful victim. It’ s about progress, not perfection. After five years, we’ re better than well, better than Joe
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Public. Because we’ ve got all these support networks.’
He was now a GP partner and government advisor, and had retrained to specialise in addictions.‘ You have to appreciate that you are good enough,’ he told delegates.‘ Say yes to opportunities that come your way. If you get involved in policy or research you can affect millions of people’ s lives, so see if you can get involved – you’ ve got valuable lived experience. No one should be written off because of the hardest chapter in their life. I own my addiction, I own my recovery. It’ s my superpower.’
BREAKING DOWN BARRIERS‘ There’ s so much good work going on in our sector,’ said Waythrough chief executive Paul Townsley as he launched the charity’ s new ten-year strategy, The way ahead.‘ But at Waythrough we strongly believe it’ s time to transform the way we deliver services.’
Over the last two years, the organisation had been talking to people with life experience, staff, volunteers and leaders and commissioners, he said.‘ We believe we can do much more to break down the barriers people experience when they need us the most. That work starts today.’
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The organisation worked across both substance use and mental health, but making sure that those services were properly joined up remained a challenge.
He’ d started volunteering in 1989, when central government had realised the seriousness of the HIV / Aids crisis.‘ My experience was that alcohol was an enormous issue not treated or resourced adequately, and people couldn’ t get an adequate response for their drug, alcohol and mental health issues. Thirty-seven years later, we’ ve addressed HIV but sadly the other two issues are still significant barriers. In most communities across the country we have the funding to see about 5-10 per cent of alcohol
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